Yesterday, I got into a fight with a sibling related to the election. In a comment, they remarked that they believed in personal responsibility, which got me thinking about how problematic that concept is. When you are successful and you believe your life to be a success solely due to your own hard work and sacrifice, then you do not like the idea of someone getting something that they didn't "earn." You, in fact, are aggrieved by this. And you think any politician who has plans that will give people things they didn't "earn" is a socialist, so you fundamentally misunderstand several concepts.
But...we don't earn all the things we get, even our own success. In my case, I went from a poor, working-class background to having a PhD and a fairly comfortable life, in part because I don't have student debt (nor does L) and I was able to make enough money to stay out of credit card debt. At first glance, it looks like I earned everything I currently have--but, it was a mixture of hard work, sure, but also fate, circumstances, luck, and not having to work against things to succeed. No one ever told me I didn't belong in academia, which happens to PhD students all the time who have more talent and ability than I do. I had a supportive adviser who made it easy for me to get a job, versus advisers who actively block or prevent talented people from getting published or getting a good job. I didn't have debt from undergrad because I had scholarships and federal financial aid back in an era when Pell Grants were higher and school cost less. L doesn't have any school debt because he earned a lot of academic and state scholarships, and he came from a family who was able to support him in various ways and encourage him to pursue higher education as a given. I had people encouraging me to go on and do good things instead of doubting me or writing me off as just another poor kid from rural Arkansas.
I think about all this, and while I did work hard, I didn't have to overcome biases and circumstances that many others do. And what the new administration wants to do is ease or erase many of those barriers to help all have access to a good life, rather than funneling wealth and power into a small group of people. Corporations accruing more money isn't done from the hard work of the owners and/or CEOs--it's built on the back of their workers, who are often treated badly or compensated poorly. Those same corporations build their power and success using systems in place--and then manage to avoid paying any taxes. The rich get richer while the poor get poorer, and upward mobility is stagnant. Communities suffer to pay for a few to prosper. Making those folks pay what they should have been paying all along and working to uplift those who are working very hard isn't undermining "personal responsibility" or giving someone something for nothing--it's aiming to erase the years of inequality that have blocked people from prospering, from living a good life. And we can't ignore the ways that white supremacy is all over this concept of "personal responsibility" because it seeks to erase the ways that systems, structures, and policies have made it fundamentally more difficult for BIPOC folks to prosper, despite all the hard work, talent, and intelligence in the world.
Anyway, that's what's on my mind. The fight took a particularly nasty turn when I, unthinking, commented about this sibling getting a government check (like me, they are employed by the government), and they took it to mean that they didn't work extremely hard to earn what they have. I don't deny that--I just think it's contradictory to say the government shouldn't work to support people when you are a part of that government structure. Ultimately, I attempted to apologize despite being verbally abused in a way that no person should have to endure from anyone--let alone a sibling--so I'm sitting here, living the schisms that have been exposed by four years of unrelenting attacks and reductionist thinking and white supremacy.
I'm hopeful for the future of our country, as long as we keep doing the work, but I'm not so sure about the fate of my familial relations.
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