Eat, Read, Run

The beginning

2012-01-25T14:58:00.002-06:00

In the beginning of every semester, there's an opportunity to get it all right, or to start off on the wrong foot. Last semester, I began on the wrong foot: I was behind on the very first day and I scrambled to get caught up. Needless to say, I was stressed all semester, and my teaching and schoolwork suffered.

Fast forward through a rejuvenating month of winter break and a semester with a bit of a lighter load. Week two, and this semester is amazing. I'm on top of things for teaching, I'm keeping up with all my schoolwork AND I'm beginning to work on my comps readings. I can't believe how much different this semester is from the fall, but I'm grateful. Even my students seem more attentive and eager to participate. I only had one student missing total out of both of my sections this semester, which never happened in the fall.

My goals for the semester are to stay on top of all my projects and read lots. But even better: I hope to get some of my research out there and actually submit something for publication. Maybe a few somethings. I've got some work done that's not bad, and I think it'd be really good if I started participating in a vital part of being a scholarship: communicating my research to other people.

Besides school, I'm also training for the Little Rock Marathon and trying to keep myself healthy, though a hopefully mild calf strain is causing me some issues currently. No matter--I'm taking a couple of rest days and eager to get back to it as soon as it's healed up. 2012 is going to be an excellent year.

Archies: 2011 Was a Year to Remember

2012-01-02T22:26:00.000-06:00

Donna has posted her annual Archies (a list of her world's top things), which sparked me to do the same. After all, 2011 was pretty epic. It began with my first solo teaching gig and a wedding and finished with a pretty decent bang. So here are my own Archies, in no particular order (except for the first):

1. Getting married. Our wedding was pretty awesome, after all.
2. Snowpocalypse 2011: Also known as the year we got married after one snowstorm and slightly before an even bigger snow storm that involved a really, really chilly night.
3. My first semester teaching.
4. PR for the half marathon: 1:56!
5. Two new nieces.
6. The return to the US of my Marine brother--just in time for the end of 2011
7. New Balance Minimus
8. This Kesha video--so bizarre. Why are there unicorns? Why is Van der Beek wearing a bra?
9. A trip to Montana during the Arkansas heat wave.
10. The National Writing Project Summer Institute
11. Swiss Buttercream
12. So much running--thanks to my running group!
13. Heckling at Twilight: Breaking Dawn
14. Sculpt class and yoga at Millennium Life Center
15. 100 push up challenge (and the ability to now do a "real" push up).
16. Storage units
17. CCCC
18. Wedding showers.
19. Bachelorette party
20. Dancing. (More dancing will happen in 2012)
21. Pinterest
22. Blood, Bones, and Butter--one of the best books I read this year.
23. Learning to make my own jewelry
24. HDMI cable
25. PR for a 5k: 24:30
26. PR for a 10k: 49:05
27. Getting accepted to RSA
28. Modern Family, Glee, and Mad Men
29. Designing and teaching a course
30. Nearing the end of coursework
31. Noodles (Ramen, soba, etc)
32. Pumpkin (or banana!) paleo pancakes
33. The Hunger Games
34. All the friends with their babies (there are so many!)

There are likely some more, but these are the ones that came to my mind off the top of my head, so enjoy! I love list making--this Archie list-making is enjoyable and allows me to reflect on the year. :)

Day One of 2012

2012-01-01T22:17:00.002-06:00

I began the day by sleeping in. Already a win.

Then I read a book. I'm on a YA fiction kick, so I've been reading Eon by Alison Goodman (preceded by the first two books of The Hunger Games trilogy and the second book in an interesting series by Alie Conde called Crossed--the first was Matched.) It's the first of two books, so I'll probably start Eona tomorrow.

After I read for a while, I decided that I really needed to get going on my long run. Usually I do long runs with my running group, but I wasn't feeling very good yesterday morning, so I skipped. Which meant I had to do it alone. Or did I? Instead of solo, I asked Lance if wanted to bike with me while I ran. We ended up both getting a lot of exercise, Lance didn't hate exercising with me, and I didn't feel lonely. (He didn't ride beside me the whole time--just came and talked to me to break up the monotony and help me open my gels when my fingers grew too cold). And I ran 18 miles! I'm feeling more and more confident in my ability to do the marathon in March.

When we got home, Lance made dinner (noodles! yum!), and I took a long shower. We then ate dinner, drank wine, shared chocolate, and watched a disc of Modern Family, which we are both enjoying.

Looking at it, it seems like a boring start to 2012, but I think it sets a good trend: spending time with people I love, eating tasty food, running, reading a good book, and watching a good TV show. What's not to love?

a lovely sunday meal

2011-10-30T20:32:00.001-05:00

a lovely sunday dinner, after a long run

solitary meals are often seen as lonely

but me, here, with this explosion of flavor

not too lonely and just right

Normally, Sunday is Potluck Night, but I wasn't feeling much up for it. The mountains of work and the other social events made me just want to burrow at home with Crystal's English as a Global Language, a beer, and a warm bowl of something delicious. This meal was simple, easy, and satisfying--all a girl home alone could ask for. Soba noodles cooked in broth with cubed tofu, sauteed beet greens, a hard-boiled egg, and homemade kimchi. Flavor and texture abound.

My month of unprocessed is nearing its end: while I failed to maintain it for the full month, I learned a lot from the experience that I hope to carry into my everyday life. 1.) My body has strange reactions to sugar/highly processed things 2.) A little treat is great maybe once a week. I might try to aim for that as a goal, perhaps a weekend muffin from my favorite bakery or somesuch. 3.) Simple food is great, homemade food is awesome, but at this point in the semester, it's hard to make a priority. It turns out that when I'm stressed and short of sleep my body screams SUGARCARBSCHOCOLATE. I don't much care for that.

Tonight, though: a delightful bowl of soup for an autumnal day.

Oops

2011-10-22T16:42:00.002-05:00

I was doing so well with the no-processed. Then came Fall Break, where I slipped a little. Then I found myself slipping a little more, and it was no good. Suddenly the blog posts dropped off as well, so I'm making a valiant effort to get back on track and finish out the challenge, extending it into November and Thanksgiving.

It started with me making some "healthy" muffins. I ate one and felt terrible--even the small amount of sugars hit my system hard. But it also triggered my cravings for it, and so I struggled to get back on track, slipping a bit more.

My body really hates sugar, though, and I spent the week feeling tired and draggy, and I'm pretty sure the processed food I was eating was giving me headaches (mostly sweets/baked goods). Good motivation to get back on the unprocessed challenge, right?

It's hard to make such a huge lifestyle change and not expect to slip, especially when I'm surrounded by food at school and other bombardments. Instead of pretending like the challenge was so easy, I thought I'd share my oops moments and how I decided to keep working on eating unprocessed foods for the remainder of the month. It's totally worth it when I feel so energetic and great, especially compared to right now.

This time of the semester is usually when I struggle with eating right and not just giving in to the sugar craze around me. I know I work better though when I'm not in a sugar-induced haze. Here's to getting back up and trying again!

Sweat It Out

2011-10-13T22:13:00.002-05:00

In a recent issue of Runner's World, Marc Parent discusses sweating in his "Newbie Chronicles" column. When he described how he would sweat in many situations that one might not deem sweat-worthy, I totally empathized. Sweat when nervous? Check. Sweat when moving slightly faster? Check. Sweat even when it's cold out? Yep. I'm not Sister Elizabeth Dunderstock bad, but when I exercise, I definitely sweat a LOT.

Yesterday, I decided to hop over to the HPER for a quick workout before my night class (especially since I missed my beloved Starbucks Wednesday morning run because of rain). There were only three of us, so she decided to kick our butts with circuits. After the first one, I was drenched.

I don't usually get embarrassed when I sweat, but glancing at the others in the class, I was the only one who seemed to be dripping all over my equipment. I felt a little bad, but then kept working out.

It's weird, but I don't feel like I sweat excessively when I run, but maybe that's because I'm usually outside. I like working out outside--it's fun and it's not usually enough to make me want to puke.

Because by the of the class, not only did I look like I got caught in an downpour, but I felt dizzy and weak. I don't normally feel dizzy and weak, even when pushing myself, and I didn't much care for it. I'm not certain what happened--after cooling down, I then went for a 20 minute run and felt better. Running is my magic pill, apparently.

I'm sore as all get out today, though, so I know I need to attend those classes more often--I'm trying hard to actually build up strength and keep it. Do you all ever feel like you just sweat crazy amounts, even when not working out?

Oh, the Stress...

2011-10-11T22:14:00.001-05:00

This is that stressful time of the semester. You know, the one where you're curled in a ball with a stack of books and the pot of coffee beside you, which you drink out of straight because a mug is too much to get between you and the caffeine that you need to maintain basic functions. The time of the year where you have THIS much to do and >this< much time, and so you start skimping on things like sleeping. Eating. Spending time with loved ones. Going to the gym. Showering.

Yep, it's the middle of the semester. Despite how much I try to prevent it from happening, I reach a point in the semester where I get completely overwhelmed. Coupled with some other stressful occurrences (which hopefully are just tiny misunderstandings that the STRESS made me blow out of proportion), I'm a bit of a mess right now.

But then there was the Fall Break. We get a Fall Break this year, and I'm gladdened and joyful to know that it's just OVER THERE. All I have to do is make it a couple of more days, and it'll be in my hand and then I can sleep and catch up and maybe even get a little ahead, as long as I don't collapse into a big pile, leaving a residue of coffee behind.

This is usually the time of the year where I eat and eat and eat. I give up on my attempts to restrict sugar or stop eating pastries or whatever, and I just go for it. I usually gain 5 pounds, which is enough to set me back on the path of healthy eating again. I hate it, but it generally happens like clockwork.

Except for this year. The month of no processed food has meant that I have been avoiding going where people will offer me delicious things full of sugar and delight. And the more I've been doing it (11 days and counting!) the more I want to keep on. Because while I am stressed, I'm feeling generally alert. Sharper. Perhaps it's wishful thinking and I'm really all slow and say really dumb things, but I feel more on the ball lately. I've been exercising more regularly than normal too, so that seems to be contributing.

Can I keep this up? I sure hope so. It's been one less stressful factor that I usually have to worry about--the not-fun feeling of having to squeeze a slightly larger self into clothes is something I'm glad to leave behind.

Weight Loss, Grad School Style

2011-10-10T14:54:00.001-05:00

How to lose weight in several easy steps:

Enroll in a graduate program, then teach two classes while taking three. Basically, you won't have time to eat or think about eating (or money to afford expensive eating). Generally, you might be scarfing down an apple and cheese while running to class, especially if you...
Decide to do an unprocessed challenge, where you stop eating and processed/refined foods. And you attempt to eat your way through a giant box of baby greens on a weekly basis. Despite the fact that you are eating avocados and large quantities of almond butter and not really counting calories, you will still find yourself losing weight. This coupled with...
The incorporation of some physical activity, like running or biking or yoga, will mean that you'll build up muscles. Muscles use more energy.

This is probably the weirdest diet I've tried, and perhaps the most effective, but I think it hinges on #2, otherwise I'd be scarfing down scones and junk food as I run to class instead of chowing down on lettuce, carrots, other vegetables and all manner of fruits. And let's not forget the almond butter.

Joking aside, I feel fantastic eating no processed stuff and eating a lot more vegetables. Lots of energy and not a strong desire for massive amounts of coffee in the afternoon, where I usually hit a slump and get really tired. I'm thinking that this might be a more permanent lifestyle change (with exceptions here and there, like once in a while on a weekend or something). I'll have to decide how sustainable this is for the long term--but thus far, it seems very doable, since I've found quick and easy unprocessed meals (it usually involves throwing stuff on a bed of lettuce).

Home Again, Home Again

2011-10-08T23:33:00.003-05:00

After an interesting brunch-meeting and a visit with some pals (and to retrieve my husband), we headed back north after a quick stop at Whole Foods. I bought a giant pumpkin, which I'll be roasting tomorrow to freeze and eat. Yum.

Not much to report on the unprocessed challenge front. I thought breakfast would be easy today, but it turns out that fresh fruit is not part of a normal conference breakfast...we were offered bacon, eggs, biscuits, gravy. I made a breakfast of eggs and half a biscuit (which I know counts as processed). My processed food count was as minimal as I could make it, but this morning I just couldn't bear to only eat eggs and coffee (I really was expecting more options, so I did not come prepared), hence the biscuit. Overall, though, for a weekend out of town, I did very well--I usually return feeling overfull and like my body is completely out of whack. Not this time!

Upon returning home, I worked on homework, made some more banana oatmeal bars, watched a bit of TV and did some push-ups. I've been neglecting my strength training, so I'm trying to work a bit back in. Gotta keep those guns looking good!

I had a great weekend: I got to spend time with friends not seen for far too long, play with small kids (which always reminds me that I love kids but don't want to have to deal with my own right now), present my work, have excellent, intellectual conversations, and escape for a little bit from the pressures of school, of my students, and of the normal daily stuff in general. Back to the grindstone tomorrow!

Eating Out

2011-10-07T22:24:00.001-05:00

As you might imagine, eating out (and traveling) while not eating processed food can be difficult. I've avoided it thus far, but part of the conference was a dinner out at a nice restaurant. Since I like to socialize (and think it's important to do at a conference) I went, knowing I could at least find something.

I probably ended up eating something processed, but I tried my best to avoid the main culprits: breads, pastas, and dessert. The hardest part is just not knowing what they could be putting in/on what might be completely innocent foods, so I probably won't be eating out at all for the rest of this month. I had a nice piece of fish and some vegetables, and some soup, which was all very tasty, though a bit rich.

I eyed the brownie/ice cream they brought out, but I just called to mind how horrible I'd feel because I knew I couldn't eat just one bite. I think deprivation is a really bad idea (and a way of mistreating the body and delicious food), so I focused on knowing that I wasn't depriving myself--I was actively making the decision to say no now with the knowledge that I was ultimately treating my body better for it. It was surprisingly not difficult; instead of thinking so much about food, I focused on having AWESOME conversations with my fellow dining companions.

Which is exactly why I opted to not be completely strict tonight and make do with the best options I had.

Day 6: Travelin' Time

2011-10-07T00:56:00.002-05:00

Tonight, I write from not my bed and not my home because I'm a'traveling! I'm down at my alma mater, presenting at an academic conference and spending a little time with a few of my peeps in the area. I gave my paper tonight about revision strategies--I thought it went pretty well and is definitely a project that I could develop more. (Best of all, I got in an academic spat with one of the other folks on the panel, but more about that later).

I was a little worried about my ability to maintain my unprocessed eating ways, but I packed acceptable foodstuffs from home, and I ran by the grocery store to pick up veggies and yogurt, whipping up a quick salad for dinner with avocado, butternut squash, carrots, and Greek yogurt. Pretty delicious and so very easy! After my quick bite, I headed to a mixer, where I drank a little red wine but shunned the various snacks (which were all extremely processed). I only kind of wanted it, so points for me!

Okay, back to the academic spat. I probably shouldn't go into too much detail, but I felt that one of the presenters gave a talk based on bad scholarship. I didn't really want to confront the presenter about it, but when others seemed to not see the major flaw, I had to say something. The assumptions and the claims were so baseless and completely drawn from very little data that I am flabbergasted that this person even functions in academia and is listened to. Given that the individual rolled eyes during my talk and made snide comments about the work I'm doing in my science writing class, I took a bit of pleasure in pointing out the flaws. In fact, I probably would have kept going except that the moderator diverted the attention to me, where the presenter than sulked off. I look forward to seeing this person at future conferences and continuing to publicly point out the flaws in the so-called research. (The person actually cited Google as a source. Seriously?)

Anyway, off to bed--I have another paper to read in the morning!

Day 5: Different Already?

2011-10-05T22:57:00.002-05:00

I really didn't know what to expect physically from eating unprocessed. Now that I've been in the true swing of things for a few days, I'm starting to notice things about my body. Apparently, it turns out that even the reasonable (or at least so I thought) amount of processed foods in my diet was enough to possibly affect how I felt.

As someone who reacts to too much sugar (or too much of several other things), I know what it's like to feel bad because of food. But with processed foods, I find that if you feel tired, you might reach for something processed, which perks you up for a bit before making you feel super tired again. It's a vicious cycle.

Today is my long day at school--I'm on campus from 9am to 9pm, teaching and learning and working (not to mention that I get up before 5am to go run). I packed my unprocessed lunch and dinner and snacks, and I noticed that while I felt the desire for my Wednesday afternoon caffeine jolt, I didn't really need it. And I never really felt sluggish like I normally do in the afternoon, and I felt really alert in class.

Could this all be because of not eating any junk on Wednesdays, like I tend to? I certainly feel better overall; lighter and cleaner. I'm not completely willing to dismiss that it could be psychosomatic, but I have a feeling that it is a real difference, even if it has only been a couple of days. One clue: a dress I bought this weekend was a bit looser in the midriff, and although I feel like I'm eating plenty, I seem to be losing weight because I'm also not as hungry and can't exactly reach for something when I'm just bored or out of habit.

All I have to say is: thank goodness for unprocessed foods that are filling and easy to make into a meal, like almond butter and cheese and apples, bananas, peaches, and salad mix. And leftovers. So many leftovers.

Day 4: Kitchen Experiments

2011-10-04T20:27:00.000-05:00

I love pancakes. When my friend K posted this link to a recipe for pumpkin "Paleo" pancakes, I was intrigued. While I generally have little interest in the Paleo diet (a vegetarian diet seems to be the one that keeps me healthy), my desire to make the pancakes stemmed from the fact that they were so very simple. Three ingredients? No refined grains or oils or other processed stuff? Taste like pancakes? Let's give 'em a shot for a quick and easy dinner after yoga.

My first pancake(s) were a flop. Big falling apart flop, so I ate them in their little crumbly pieces. And didn't take a picture, except of the batter.

Second attempt, I made just one big one in the middle of the pan and let them cook all the way through before flipping. Much better. And doesn't it look like a normal pancake? Who'd know it was just pumpkin, almond butter, and an egg!

Man, they are delicious. Extremely simple, very filling, and I felt pretty good. I ate mine with Greek yogurt* and sliced bananas and a little drizzle of honey.

This morning, I made them for Lance and me for breakfast. His reaction was surprise: he exclaimed that they were pretty tasty. This morning, I mixed pumpkin and banana to make the batter and ate mine with Greek yogurt and honey. And sure enough, they did a pretty good job of keeping me decently full until lunch time. I'll try them again tomorrow, probably, for a post-run breakfast (also known as breakfast #2) after my 5:30am run. Give them a try--they are easy and delicious!

Grain-Free "Paleo" Pancakes

(adapted from The Paleo Project blog)

Makes enough for one serving, but they are easily doubled for two!

1 banana or big scoop of pureed pumpkin (to make two servings, I used both)
1 egg
1 big spoonful of almond butter (probably around 2 tbsp)

Mash/mix/puree all ingredients together. I used a fork and a vigorous stirring method, but if you feel like dirtying your blender/food processor, go for it.

Pour batter onto hot/greased skillet and cook until little bubbles form on the top and the edges are firm. Flip and cook on the other side. Put on a plate and gobble down with whatever topping suits your fancy: I'm fond of fruit, Greek yogurt, and honey myself.

*I think Paleo eaters avoid dairy, so if you're a Paleo person, find something else delicious to eat on it. Luckily, I'm not a Paleo eater because, damn, I love me some Greek yogurt.

Day 3: In the Rhythm

2011-10-03T15:08:00.001-05:00

When beginning this project, I was not prepared for the complete mind shift I would have to make. For example, I reached for my friend's funnel cake and nibbled on it before I even remembered that I wasn't eating processed food. I had remembered it earlier when I was offered chips and cookies, and it was pretty easy to turn it down (without lengthy explanations that I'm eating particularly), but when A offered the funnel cake up, I pinched off a piece without even thinking.

Which led me to think about how much of our food choices can be unthinking. Not that we should obsess about what we eat every moment of everyday--food can be one of the many delights of life, after all--but the unthinking grabbing of a cookie. Or a piece of candy. Or any other mindless eating that we may engage in throughout the day, not because of hunger or anything but for other reasons. Funnel cakes are delicious. That cookie was just sitting there. Someone offered me a cupcake, and I ate it without assessing if I really wanted it or if I was really even hungry.

Now that I'm having to be more conscious and deliberate about what I eat, I realize that I'm definitely someone for whom food is not always a matter of hunger and response to hunger. There are lots of other factors, and habit is one of them. It's almost habitual to want a bite of what Lance is nibbling on instead of just waiting for dinner or until I'm hungry.

Anyway, just some thoughts. I'm definitely not opposed to snacking or sweets, but I think I prefer to be little more aware of what goes into my body. This experiment is a lot about cultivating awareness.

A little glimpse of what I'm eating:

Breakfast
Steel cut oats with a little pumpkin puree (that I roasted and pureed myself from the pumpkin you see there!), honey, cinnamon, walnuts, and raisins. Coffee and half and half. I really love pumpkin oatmeal--so filling and tasty and seasonal.

Lunch
Mixed greens with roasted vegetables and edamame avocado salad. Banana and a dab of almond butter. That Avocado Edamame salad is fantastic--I made it last night and thoroughly enjoyed it, though I think I need to drain off the excess dressing. The dressing itself is pretty tasty on its own, and it's one thing we so often purchase that can easily be made at home with a few simple ingredients (vinegar, oil, seasonings).

Snack
Piece of cheese (without anything crazy in it, so it passes the "kitchen test") and an apple. It's apple season--I love it! Apple with cheese is one of my favorite snacks.

Day 2: Complicated Yogurt

2011-10-02T13:06:00.001-05:00

Yesterday, we went to the grocery store to pick up a few items for the week, and I decided to get some yogurt. I figured that my standard yogurt would work just fine, because it's all-natural and organic and made of magical milk and all; however, I quickly discovered that even the high-quality, organic yogurts have ingredients that count as processed.

It was a little disturbing to pick up carton after carton of yogurts and find all manner of additives: inulin, pectin, dry milk powder: basically ingredients that are added to make it thicker. Inulin is a starch that is naturally occurring, but extracting it requires heavy processing. I'm certain I could not make that at home. Pectin I probably could, but not the pectin that they put into yogurt. Basically, I discovered that most brands of yogurt are more processed than I realized (and that this challenge might be more difficult than I realized).

Happily, I found a yogurt with only one ingredient (cultured milk)--Chobani Greek yogurt. It's a little expensive, but I like having a little yogurt every now and then, especially since I don't really drink milk much. It's pretty tasty too, thick and creamy without lots of saturated fat or additives to make it thicker.

Reading the labels really hit home to me that I apparently look only for the obviously problematic ingredients, but I don't think about the nature of some of the foods I buy without really examining the labels. Sometimes I'm just content to know that it's organic or all-natural, even though I know that being organic (and certainly being all-natural) doesn't mean something isn't junk food or is good for me.

No Unprocessed: Day 1

2011-10-01T12:20:00.001-05:00

I've decided to participate in a little food challenge called October Unprocessed, where I spend one month not eating anything processed. Cool, I thought, as I signed up for the challenge. Now it's day 1, and while I don't think it's going to be that difficult for me, I realized I didn't think all the way through what "unprocessed" would be.

The sponsoring blog, Eating Rules, uses the "kitchen test" rule to determine processed from unprocessed. The idea would be if I could reasonably make it in my own home, it doesn't count. (So, my cans of tomatoes are cool, but boxed mac and cheese not so much. Or really any boxed pasta or anything that has weird ingredients or ingredients I couldn't use at home).

So, for one, no white flour or white sugar. These foodstuffs are typically processed within an inch of their lives, nowhere near their whole form. Luckily, I can find bread and stuff that's made with whole wheat flour (which I can, theoretically, grind at home because we have an awesome food grinder), and if Lance bakes some bread, I'll probably eat that if it is mostly whole grain. He told me that rolled oats are cool, though, because they are simply rolled--no craziness (and you theoretically can roll them at home). I'll probably go for more of the steel cut oats, though.

The muffin I ate at my favorite bakery this morning in my pre-coffee haze was definitely a violation, though. But now I'm aware.

Mostly, I want to see how hard it'll be to avoid processed stuff. Most people who know how I eat know that I generally eat healthy with little junkfood, but I sometimes let it sneak in when I'm bombarded by stuff at school. I want to see how much I let that stuff sneak into my diet--probably a little more than I realized, given the muffin I ate this morning--and how difficult it might be to prepare and cook food for myself while maintaining a crazy-busy schedule (luckily, Lance is a HUGE help with dinner cooking).

I also plan to blog through it and share recipes, so here's my first as a replacement for my morning granola bars: Banana Oatmeal Bars!

Banana Oatmeal Bars
(adapted slightly from freisencold.com)

2 large or 3 medium ripe bananas
1-3/4 cup rolled oats
1/2 cup chopped dried dates
1/4 cup flax seed
1/4 cup walnuts
cinnamon

In a bowl, mash the banana. Add the rest of the ingredients, stir. Press the batter into into a lightly greased 9x9 pan and bake in a 350 degree oven for about 30 minutes. Cut up and eat!

Broken Record

2011-09-18T16:31:00.001-05:00

When I sat down to dinner the night before the race, I was peppered with queries about my goals: what was I shooting for? What did I want to get out of the race? How'd I feel? This was somewhat new to me, but since I've become increasingly involved in a running group, forming friendships and receiving (and giving!) motivation, I realized how influential these questions and goal-setting could be. Tentatively, I said that I was going for under 2 hours, since I wanted to set a PR.

Deep down, I was both sure I could do it--hadn't I run consistently throughout the summer? And hadn't my fellow runners (and L) told me that I was getting faster?--and also sure that maybe I shouldn't set too high a goal for myself. I mean, after all, my best races were the once where I went in without a firm goal and just ran it.

I set out with Abby, and we ran and ran. The course was difficult, both in terms of hilly terrain and slick, muddy road conditions, but we were enjoying ourselves. It was fun to be running through a cool Ozark morning, watching the horses run beside us at one point (they were excited!) and looking out at the gorgeous green hills. Even a five minute rain couldn't drench our spirits. We were running with each other, and we knew that our fellow runners who we knew or just met were running alongside.

Toward the end of the race, Abby took off, feeling good. I stayed close behind, the final hills taking a toll on my already tired legs. I was planning to let it loose on the last mile, but the hill was so steep that I just couldn't sprint. I realized that I probably could have pushed it harder a bit earlier, but this is my 3rd half after all--I'm still learning how to budget my energy. I saw the finish line, and ran as hard as I could, crossing the line and setting a PR (personal record) for the half.

The whole experience was amazing. I registered for the race on a whim, but the best part was that I didn't run it alone--I ran it with running friends and amazing women who all set PRs of their own. And best of all, I've decided that I am ready for a marathon, and will keep increasing those long runs this fall with the goal of running one in December.

Empty?

2011-09-08T10:40:00.002-05:00

You'd think I'd have nothing to write about by my long silence, but you'd be wrong. A short list of what's being going on in the interim:

Montana trip! (And visiting a baby!)
Running, running, running
I can do a real push up now, which is exciting to only me
History of the English Language: nerd-tastic
Teaching: I'm teaching a Science Writing course, which has a blog that I have been updating, so my writing energies have been focused out.
Various crafty projects that I hope to share with you soon.
One week and counting without my husband at home
Also one week without a car, relying on my two legs, a bicycle, and the generosity of friends
Fall semester is busy, busy, busy, and I'm trying to make sure I don't lag behind
Half-marathon coming up in a week! (My first of the year)

Anyway, this is a partial and incomplete list, but I hope to get my writing brain going by posting a list of things I should deal with in more detail. So here goes...

A Summer Cake to Beat the Heat

2011-08-04T11:19:00.000-05:00

Every summer, I volunteer to be a "teacher buddy:" I get to hang out with three Mexican teachers who come to AR for a teacher training program. Last night, I had them over for dinner, and I made them this cake:

It was delicious. It's a riff off of my favorite ginger muffins from Marion Cunningham's The Breakfast Book. I love this cookbook--it has great recipes (my favorite oatmeal pancakes are also in this book). If you're looking for a new cookbook, get this one--it's all about breakfast!

Anyway, here's what you're wanting: the cake recipe. :)

Fresh Ginger Cake with Peaches and Whipped Cream
(from The Breakfast Book by Marion Cunningham)

big knob of fresh ginger, unpeeled, cut into large chunks
1 cup sugar, divided
zest of one lemon
1 stick of butter, room temperature
2 eggs
1 cup buttermilk
2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp baking soda

whipped cream
powdered sugar
vanilla
fresh peaches
chopped crystallized ginger

Preheat oven to 350 degrees and prepare two 8" or 9" cake pans (I used 9")

Put the ginger into a food processor/food chopper (or chop finely by hand) and chop, chop, chop. You should have about 1/4 cup of ginger bits, but don't fret if you have too much (I'm of the opinion that a little more is better). Put into a small saucepan with 1/4 cup of sugar and cook until the sugar melts and the mixture is heated, stirring constantly. Set aside to cool. When cool, mix in the lemon zest.

In a small bowl, mix flour, salt and baking soda and set aside.

Beat the butter and the rest of the sugar until smooth and creamy. Add the eggs and beat well. Add the buttermilk. Add the flour mixture and beat until smooth (but not too much). Add the lemon ginger mixture.

Spoon the batter into the prepared pans and bake until done (about 20-25 minutes, depending on your pan). Cool in pans briefly, then invert onto racks until completely cooled.

Meanwhile, peel and chop about three peaches. Reserve one half to slice for the top.

Once cooled, beat the whipped cream with sugar and vanilla (to taste). Spoon a bit on the bottom layer, then pile the chopped peaches on top. Use the rest of the whipped cream to frost the cake, then garnish with the sliced peach half and chopped crystallized ginger.

Running in Oklahoma

2011-08-03T11:03:00.000-05:00

It's hot, in the winding maze
of the subdivision--
but the sprinklers are a brief delight

distracting from the dusky burn,
and the knowledge--
that sprinklers are a waste of water.

NWAWP: Anthology piece

2011-07-19T13:50:00.000-05:00

As part of the NWAWP Summer Institute, we are asked to produce a number of writings, one of which goes into an anthology that everyone gets a copy of. Here is the piece I have been working on since the first day of the SI about my kitchen.

Our Kitchen

The concrete is cool beneath my bare feet. It’s summer, so the windows are open and the breeze rustles the leaves and carries the scent of the outdoors into the kitchen, where I stand at the counter, contemplating dinner. The sunshine-yellow walls lend a soft glow to the shady space and the floor is a pleasant contrast to the summer warmth, a heat kept somewhat at bay by the surrounding trees. We try not to run the small air conditioner—stationed in one of the two kitchen windows—which must work too hard to keep the entire house reasonably cool. Instead, we rely on shade and gusts of fresh air to keep our home tolerable during the hot, thick Arkansas days. In the winter, the floors are frigid even with thick socks and slippers on, but in the summer, it is enjoyable on bare feet. Even when it reaches the hottest part of the day, the floor is a relief as I remove stifling shoes and spread my toes to allow the coolness to seep in, and we are thankfully past the period where they sweat from the sudden temperature changes of late spring. I do not use our oven much in the summer.

Neko, our tubby tortoiseshell, lies with warm belly pressed into the cold floor, regarding me with amber eyes, waiting for me to offer a treat: a dab of peanut butter, a corner of cheese, or a spoon of canned cat food. The cat and one person are all the space holds comfortably: we live in a small duplex with only a corner that holds standard kitchen appliances as well as a washer and dryer. Along the one wall that opens out into the living room, stand the refrigerator, the storage freezer with the microwave on top, a bookcase transformed into a pantry by simply adding food to its shelves, the finicky gas stove, and the dryer. We don’t have much counter space, so the dryer also serves as a baking station with my beloved second-hand Kitchen Aid in a place of honor and easy reach. Parallel to this wall and separated by a pitifully small gap reside the few kitchen cabinets full of dishes and bakeware, the sink, and the one stretch of counter, which is dominated by canisters, dish-drainer, and toaster-oven. I often gaze out the window above the sink as my hands methodically scrub plates, cups, cast iron skillets. No dishwasher, alas. Along the short connecting wall—and below the home of the air conditioner—is a “temporary” prep table, housing a massive butcher block remnant from a friend’s kitchen renovation. It is here where carrots are chopped, onions diced, tofu cubed for our latest meal. In front of this table is a kitchen stool acquired for $5 from a yard sale that my husband loves because he grew up with a stool in the kitchen, and the cat loves because she can sit on it and beg for treats, and I love because it becomes additional space for my copy of How to Cook Everything Vegetarian or the mixing bowl that I need to set aside and have no room for.

The kitchen itself has a spot for every item, though it may seem a bit cluttered to the untrained eye: the bookshelf-turned-pantry is loaded with homemade pickles and jams made from our own garden’s bounty or farmers’ market purchases, as well as canned tomatoes and coconut milk, boxes of pasta, jars of beans and rices in several colors and varieties, little tins and sacks of exotic spices. I occasionally attempt to inventory, to sort, to tidy up the shelves, but in the rush of cooking and living, the sheer volume of random ingredients acquired from Indian and Asian grocers and health food stores and the bargain bin at Marvin’s IGA bursts from their holes and spills out until I’m once again digging through piles of sacks looking for the cumin or that little blue Ziploc of matcha powder or the cinnamon sticks. Once, in a frenzy of cleaning and sorting, I accidentally threw out cumin seeds because it looked like fennel and we already had lots of fennel and my husband had neglected to label it. We then proceeded to yell at each other, me at him about labeling the damned spices from the bulk bins, him at me about yelling at him and throwing out items I couldn’t identify. It ended with us laughing so hard that we had to lean on the kitchen counter and catch our breath.

It’s afternoon, and because of where our house is, the sun doesn’t shine directly in the windows at five o’clock, as I’m removing ingredients from the refrigerator to begin cooking. With the summer air slowing my blood, I feel like cooking something simple, light, crisp. A salad, perhaps, with greens picked from the garden? Or Asian-inspired summer rolls, served with a spicy peanut sauce we love so much? A quick stir-fry sounds good, where I can toss anything and everything lurking in the crisper, along with a splash of soy, a dash of sriracha, a hearty dollop of ginger and garlic for flavor. Served over rice and eaten with the chopsticks given to us after a friend’s trip to Japan, stir-fry is one meal we never seem to tire of because of its infinite possibilities. I begin measuring rice to cook on the stove while I proceed to prepare the vegetables and heating oil in the large cast iron. I rarely measure anything anymore—just a pour and a spoonful and a taste until it’s just right. It’s an art taught to me by my husband, who cooks by feel. I’m much more of a baker, which requires strict measuring and precision and following directions carefully, but he balances out my desire for constant order, and I learned how to cook by taste instead of methodically moving through a recipe. It certainly makes cooking more of an adventure, though it can be unfortunate when I make something delicious and I have no idea what proportion of ingredients went into it and my friends want the recipe.

Sometimes, especially when there’s more than one cook and her cat, I wish our kitchen were spacious, all white and stainless steel, polished and stacked neatly. Instead, I have clutter and piles and a blocked set of drawers that I keep trying to get my husband to set free. Sometimes I wish the sacks of fragrant spices were jars lined up in alphabetical order, locked sterilely away in a cabinet instead of out for any visitors to eye and pass their silent judgment. Like my mother before me, I long for a space that belongs in the pages of a Martha Stewart magazine, where there is a place for everything and everything in its place. But unlike my mother before me, I know better than to think that I will ever actually live in such a space because even if I had that white kitchen, it would be spattered with cake batter or from sauce or from jams. There would be dishes in the sink and food on the counters and the cat would insist on being on the floor, leaving bits of herself behind for me to constantly sweep up. Occasionally, it would be in order, but only because we went out for Thai that day, or one of us got tired of the clutter and cleaned it up. Our kitchen is simply too often used to ever be gleaming and perfectly clean—something is always out of place because of a project in process or because of a project just completed. A true workshop.

It doesn’t stop me from trying to replicate the kitchen in my head, though. That kitchen has everything labeled and easy to find and that kitchen doesn’t have a table half-blocking the column of drawers, making opening and closing them futile and frustrating and punctuated by OWs and DAMN-ITs and SHITs. In my mind, the cabinets have been repainted from the strange orange-pink that looks like tainted Pepto to a cheery red to complement the cheery yellow, or a demure gray. The stove actually lights when I flip on the gas instead of intermittently working and then having to be lit by the cigarette lighter we keep in the spice rack. The detritus on the floor has found a place and the kitchen is more spacious and open because the clutter has been tidy squirreled away. The dishes are always promptly washed (by my husband, of course). We have a dishwasher. I can stand to use the oven in the summer in this kitchen, without having to stand scantily clad and pouring sweat. And no matter how much we cook, the kitchen is always clean and tidy because we wash up as we work and the floors are swept free of any debris.

But I love our kitchen, piles and all. I love the rows of canning jars hidden high above the kitchen window, with the door that falls open occasionally, scaring whomever is standing by the sink. I love the temporary table that hasn’t moved in the two years we’ve lived in the house, which hides away our recycling bin, and boxes of jars found while clearing out an abandoned attic. It’s often a frustrating space, limited in counter and cabinet and overflowing with bakeware and ingredients. But it’s also a space where I create. It’s where I stir batters and release the worries from the day while pulling muffins with perfectly mounded tops from the old gas oven. It’s where I meditate, measuring flour and sugar and butter, blending and beating into creamy perfection. It’s where I have created the perfect pancake, baked cupcake after delectable cupcake and explored countless recipes, flavors, and textures. When I enter the kitchen, even when it swirls with chaos, the act of opening a cookbook and setting out the ingredients and mixing bowls is an act of purification and calming. I am totally focused when I bake, my mind devoid of the never-ending to-do list or anxiety about tasks or stress from having too much to do and too little time. When I cook, I enter a mini-Zen state where it’s just me, the cookbook, the ingredients, and the making. I exist because I create.

In this kitchen, my husband and I learned to cohabitate and cooperate and forgive each other. When we first started cooking together, he would relegate me to the corner to open cans. After I demanded more skillful tasks, he allowed me to chop vegetables, but he often hovered so much that I wanted to chop him. He said it was because he was afraid I’d cut myself with my limited knife skills; I think it was because his engineering mind does not enjoy when other people do tasks less efficiently—basically, not how he would do them. We move in cycles with our cooking together. Ideally, we complete tasks in separate spaces with separate goals and reunite to bring the dish together. I’ll make the sauce, he’ll cook the pasta. Or I’ll chop the vegetables, and he’ll fry the tofu. At the other end, he stands over my shoulder critiquing my pancake cooking or adding spices and ingredients to my soup without asking me, and I scold him for cooking with too much fish sauce or using butter when a little olive oil would be just fine or for dumping too many ingredients in my macaroni and cheese when I just want it to be straightforward and simple. Yet, we generally manage to work peaceably in the kitchen, listening to music and chatting amiably, asking one another questions, such as What is it missing? Do you think it needs more salt? Do you want quinoa or rice with this? Many of our sweetest moments happen in the kitchen, like when I walk up behind him while he’s stirring something and wrap my arms around his waist and bury my face into the best part of neck, warm and smelling of him, or when he wraps me in a strong embrace. He has learned to wait for me to ask for help if I want it, rather than listing what is wrong, and I have learned that sometimes allowing him to dump lots of spices in a dish makes it pretty tasty.

Our kitchen is the place where we have fought over dishes, he insisting that I not wash dishes after I failed to get them clean enough (fine with me) and especially when I stabbed myself in the arm by leaving a paring knife pointy end up in the dish-drainer (no, it was not intentional); unfortunately, I sometimes have to prod him to wash them. It is the place where he made our wedding food, beginning with durum semolina and a pasta roller and ending with trays and trays of the best vegetarian lasagnas that you’ve ever eaten and freshly baked bread. We spend so much of our days thinking about and discussing food, followed by cooking and sharing, that the food at our wedding was required to be spectacular. And spectacular it was, with everyone dishing up plates of lasagna, carving up pies, and diving into the cakes and homemade ales, much of it made in our small, humble kitchen.

It’s where we’ve hosted wildly successful parties, everyone standing around in the kitchen with plates and drinks in hand or on the counters, sampling the food we’ve created with our two hands or that friends have brought with them. Many of our friends are exceptionally good cooks, and it’s always fun to see what everyone will bring to a social gathering. When we host a party, we always have plenty of good, homemade food—I generally make a cake that is both a feast for the eyes and the mouth, and he makes these amazing steamed dumplings that are never the same—and the wine and beer are plentiful. It turns out that a small space makes for a great gathering, since everyone is forced into close proximity and conversation and the few chairs are constantly being vacated and occupied in random rotation. We love hosting parties in our tiny home because it makes the whole house light up and feel alive, buzzing with music and conversation and the scrape of plates and the groans of full stomachs. On nights like this, you can almost feel the kitchen smile with the pleasure of a place satisfied with having a purpose. And ultimately, that’s why I love our kitchen: it’s where we live.

NWAWP: Fayetteville Moment

2011-07-18T15:20:00.000-05:00

I wanted to share my "Fayetteville Moment" with you all. I wrote this piece as part of the 2011 NWAWP Writing Marathon. All day, we hung out around Fayetteville and wrote. At 1pm, the entire group stopped whatever they were working on and wrote "in the moment." My friend J and I were at the pool, so I observed the life going on around me and wrote!

Wilson Park Pool: 12:58 PM

There’s this little kid, like maybe four years old and his mother has just yanked him into the water because he was splashing at us. I find that as a childless woman who teaches adults that I have little patience for small, mischievous children. Sure, my baby nieces are cute and I enjoy hanging out with my friends’ children, but kids I do not really know? Not so crazy about. This might change when I have my own child, maybe.
            The Wilson Park Pool: a Fayetteville oasis for summer-freed kids and their parents and for NWAWP fellows who need freedom from chairs and tables and sitting. The smell of spray-on sunscreen wafts through the air, accenting the scent of chlorine and trees. The water glistens like my sapphire-like drop earrings, warmed slightly by the sun but still refreshing on the hot, sunny day. Children’s excited voices blend with splashing and gasps of air: the large plop of a little boy leaping into his mother’s waiting arms, the kick-kick-kick! of a little girl practicing her swimming, the gaspcough of novices learning how to dunk the heads beneath the water’s surface. I’m amazed by the bravery of these children, who splash and leap and submerge as though water were just wet air, posing no threat.
            Adults—mostly parents and two NWAWP fellows—watchfully guard their offspring, occasionally joining in the delight of the water. They sun themselves, apply sunscreen. You can tell the families that come regularly: they have their routines, their designated places, their friends who come by smiling and greeting.
            A tall lifeguard comes by, tanned and clad in red shorts and chacos, the summer uniform of the teenagers who watch over these waters. They patrol, blow whistles, and keep children from breaking the laws of the land. The pool is its own country and it is dominated by youth and controlled by the posted rules and enforced by the red-suited adolescents. They are wary, watchful, aloof.
            We are here to write, of course, but while we’re here, why not take a dip? We leap…well, we lower ourselves, anyway, into the water feeling how it flows over our skin. I move my arms and legs fluidly and cut through the water. I cannot stay still, just as I cannot be near the water without being in it. I would swim until I passed out, if I could. I always regret that my mother never taught me how to swim properly when I was young because I harbor a deep fear of jumping in and remain jealous of the six year olds who leap without concern. And although I’m a perfectly adequate swimmer, I’m uncomfortable straying too far from a hand hold. I watch these kids who dip and dive without fear and hesitation, and I wonder how different my life would be if I were bold enough to leap, anxiety-free, from the diving board.
            The hourly break time is over, and at the sound of the whistles, the kids let out a collective cry and leap as one into the water. It’s just like a movie, and we are so stunned at the sight that we laugh. They resume their activities, and the new arrivals pause only for a quick douse of sunscreen before joining their fellow creatures. One mother wrangles her little girl into a swim vest before releasing her into the wild.
            Two of the regular adults, a couple wearing their matching sunhats, leap into the pool to cool off. They look as though ten years ago, they were wild and free, into punk rock and possibly smoking pot. Having children and growing older, they find those days have faded to fond memories and hazy impressions and cautionary tales to tell their children. The man is heavily tattooed, an impressive and lovely tree curling across his back, an owl perched at his left shoulder. The tree and owl are artfully done, and I find myself admiring it and thinking that the fact it is not realistic is a point in its favor. I also wonder what it means to him. They reemerge from the water, refreshed, to resume their napping and reading. Their kids are old enough that they do not feel the need to guard them, as the parents of the toddlers do.
            A little girl rushes up and plaintively complains of hunger, but her mother is busy scribbling in a notebook and shoos her away. Other children should CANNONBALL while jumping into the water in a manner other than ball-like. I think they just want to shout something and cannonball lends itself nicely to being screamed while leaping through the air.
            Everyone complains that the Wilson Park Pool is too filled with children (and children’s water) to be any fun for an adult, but I disagree. For one, the concentration of young swimmers is the shallow end; only the older and bolder venture far from where they can’t reach the bottom, leaving plenty of space for the adults to swim laps, leap from the diving board, or float peaceably far from the splashing and cannonballs and shouts and squeals. For another, there’s something essentially summer about the sounds of individuals who come to the pool not because they need to exercise but for the pure pleasure of moving in and under and through the water. They form small clumps of associates, dare each other to dive or to jump, and chatter excitedly. They are full of joy and life, thinking not about how many calories swimming burns or that their form isn’t just right. All they seem to consider is that the water is cool and refreshing, that humping in is enormously fun, that learning to do handstands impresses their fellow swimmers, and that swimming freakin’ awesome.
            A man, approximately as round as he is tall, asks us if we are doing homework. “Writing,” we reply. “About what?” “Well, the pool.” “Good place for it.” We smile and return to our notebooks. It’s almost time to leap into the water again and then to try off and head to our next location. The breeze stirs the trees above us and dries the water off us. If you listen closely, the sound of leaves clattering complements the splashing, shouting, and chatter, and here we are in the midst of a snapshot of a perfect July day in Fayetteville.

Summer Institute: Week One Reflection

2011-07-05T13:29:00.000-05:00

We are now in the second week of the NWP Summer Institute, and interesting results have begun already. Though we have three more weeks (or so) of the SI left, I think we've leaped over a major hurdle. The first day, several Fellows expressed their anxiety and fear about writing, about teaching writing, and about sharing their writing. By the end of the first week, a perceptual shift had already begun. Many who swore they would never present found themselves in Author's Chair* at the end of the day, reading stories and reflections that were beautiful and inspiring in so many ways. In our response groups (made up of four individuals), fellows who claimed to be anxious about writing were sharing their pieces. The attitude change can really only be the result of a) being told that writing is important, b) being given time to write, c) having a friendly, receptive, and active audience, and d) hearing others talk about themselves as writers and listening to others' writing.

I find this transformation (after only one week, mind you!) fascinating. I came in assuming all the Fellows were writers who were comfortable with writing and were simply looking for a professional development that would help them build on that identity and their skills to teach writing even better. Imagine my shock when a couple of teachers expressed their anxiety about writing and about teaching writing. I found myself in a minority of Fellows who truly felt comfortable in saying "I'm a writer," and in sharing my writing with a broader audience.

I think this dramatic shift speaks highly both of my fellow participants and of what the National Writing Project can do. It's exciting, and as I'm writing during Silent Sustained Writing time, I'm happy for the opportunity to be here, learning from my peers and actually spending time with pen to paper (or fingers to keys) producing words and realizing how important working daily on writing is to me.

*Author's Chair is the half hour set aside at the end of the day for the Fellows to share any piece of writing with the whole group.

Public Log (Summer Institute: Day 3)

2011-06-30T09:35:00.001-05:00

Well, week one is half over, and we’re off to a good start. I’ve been thinking about the ways that the Summer Institute is like a race: it seems to be equal parts marathon and relay race. I say marathon because it’s a long stretch to the end—no quick sprint one-day workshop here. Right now, in the first week, we’ve just set out from the starting line and our legs are fresh and we are eager to be here. Perhaps the last week, we’ll be a little more tired, but once we cross that finish line, we’ll be exhausted but exhilarated with what we’ve accomplished.

Right, so first week. We’ve made it to Day 4, yay! And There Will Be Food today—a bit of sustenance to keep us going strong. Our first three days, we have set out at a good pace. We’ve had two demonstrations, and I know I (for one) have been writing more these past three days than I did for most of the last semester, stretching those writing muscles. I think some of us feel limber, some perhaps a bit sore from new activity. The best thing I’ve found to ease the pain of sore muscles, though, is to keep going—so on we must go. Although this is often an individual race, we’re really not competing—we are all running alongside one another, and often running as one unit, a team. We all have to do our part to make sure that the Summer Institute is a success, and so far everyone’s legs seem to be up to the challenge, even if many of us are unaccustomed to the activities.

After our nightly breather (also known as sleep), we got going again yesterday with the starting pistol—well, chime, and Mike read to us about leadership and told us we’re all leaders. There was some discussion about t-shirts or a goody bag—all good races have them—and then we’re into Lap One: listening to Michelle read the Log in the style of Dr. Suess. Today she’s passed the baton on to me—this is how it’s like a relay—and I find myself a little nervous starting my leg of the race. But as our fearless team leaders tell us: WE CAN DO THIS. She had us write about a book from our childhood, a prompt I think we all loved. During races, runners near one another often share stories and talk to one another, and Dawn and Theresa both shared stories so sweet and poignant that it made me tear up a little. Jacqueline told the story of how she’d always wrangle How the Grinch Stole Christmas away from her older sister during the holidays by quoting the lines ahead of her. Nathan regaled us with his questions about why there were monkeys in Caps for Sale, and I read why I loved The Secret Garden. I realized that we love these books not just because of their content but because of the memories they evoke when we think about them. Everyone who shared their Quick Write had specific memories and emotions attached to their book. We ended this segment with a little rest and time to refuel.

We took a little longer than anticipated, but rounded the corner only a little behind into the next lap of the day: demonstrations! Jacqueline took the lead on this and totally ran with it, presenting a totally paper-less lesson on Analysis. Here, we entered the college classroom, watched clips from Mad-Men, and learned that Brenda has two husbands—what?? That made us stop dead in our tracks until she clarified, and then we laughed and picked back up the pace. Jacqueline showed us how we can use digital tools to enhance and facilitate collaborative work, and I for one was eager to use Google Docs to enhance my own running…I mean, teaching.

At this phase in the race, we’re getting a feel for our running companions. We learned that Zack—or is it Jack?—is a bit of a prankster, sending texts in the guise of a man named Carl. He’ll probably be that guy who will dump Gatorade on your head at the water stop. Jack, watch out because Jamie will exact her revenge on you before the end of our marathon here. Chris brought the extra long Twizzlers, which he’ll probably use later on to whip us into shape, or make us run, I mean write faster. During a rest break, Jamie was egged on to place the animal crackers in, well…compromising positions. We’re quickly learned who are the runners who spend much of their time in the gutter, and who are the ones laughing at their antics.

After a lap of individual running in the guise of Silent Sustained Writing, we met back up to complete the course for the day with Author’s Chair. Getting in the spirit of running ahead of the pack, Theresa leapt out and read us the start of her historical/family narrative. Nathan read lovely poetry about chairs, and Dawn read a work in progress about her favorite place in South Africa. Jamie passed out our readings for tomorrow—Jack (Zack?) found a little surprise in his packet—and with the finishing chime, we all stopped and were able to rest. One more day of our marathon down, and before we know it, we’ll be at the end of the race, collapsed on the finish line. And like good runners, we’ll already be thinking about our next event.

QUICK WRITE: List three of your favorite physical activities. Pick one of them and write a story about something that happened while you or someone you know was doing that activity, or what it is about that activity that makes you enjoy it.

Summer Institute: Day 2

2011-06-29T13:41:00.000-05:00

...And, we're off! Day 2, and we already participated in our first demonstration by one of the Fellows. TT, a fifth grade teacher, did an EXCELLENT demonstration on the Dust Bowl. We wrote lots of different ways and really enjoyed what she showed us. I'm a little nervous about the demonstration, but luckily I'm going in a couple of weeks, so I get to really work on it before presenting!

The day began with the Reading of the Log. Tomorrow will be my turn, so I've been taking notes and watching all day. H read the log, and it was all very entertaining. I think we're going to start egging each other on to write funny logs and really come up with clever ways to deliver them. I plan to post mine for tomorrow on NWP e-Anthology, a site for Fellows to share their Summer Institute experiences. H prompted us to write about a food experience, and I shared the most recent memory: making a delicious lemon cake for A's going-away potluck.

After the Log, CG gave us a pep-talk/lecture about professional writing. He encouraged us to seek ways to get published--and I really want to work toward that goal. I've got several pieces started, and the one piece that I'm working on with my adviser, so hopefully this year I can begin submitting articles to various journals.

We had a nice session of SSW: Silent Sustained Writing. I like that they give us lots of time to write; it also gives me some time to work on the writing for the projects that I have going.

I tinkered around with my "Kitchen" piece a lot the first night, so I shared it during Author's Chair time, the last block in the schedule for Fellows to share something they've been working on. It's interesting and scary and exciting to read stuff to my fellow participants, but I'm glad for the opportunity.

The days go by so quick, and I just feel my head filling with ideas and the itch to write again. It's amazing how writing makes you want to write more...

Summer Institute: Day 1

2011-06-28T09:53:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was Day 1 of the National Writing Project Summer Institute, a four-week long program exploring the connections between writing, education, and writing instruction. The first day was part-orientation, part-introductions. We began with one of the mentors delivering the Daily Log, a summary of the last meeting's events. He delivered it in the style of Stephen Colbert, using "The Word" segment. We then participated in our first Quick Write: a short burst of writing to get the creative juices flowing. Our prompt was a dialogue of who we might like to have dinner with, and I picked Tolkien (of course). We shared our dialogues, and Chris's was the funniest, a conversation with THE Cookie Monster. Cooookies!

We moved into some business and orientation and expectations, breaking up into our response groups. I think my response group is going to be awesome--they are a supportive audience who will offer great suggestions for each other's writing.

After lunch, we observed and participated in a lesson demonstration, one of our major products for the institute. The teacher gave an excellent and fun demonstration over revision (geared for a 4th-grade classroom). She has us write about our favorite space, a piece that I continued to play with throughout the afternoon and later into the evening.

The group of teachers is a fun*, friendly group, and I'm excited to be able participate.

*Favorite words/phrases: "diggin' like a dog in a hole" and "shoulding."

Unstructured Time

2011-06-17T09:10:00.000-05:00

You would think that I'd return to my regular writing schedule now that the semester is done (and has been done for a full month). You would think that, wouldn't you? Well, you'd be wrong.

I have a secret: I'm no good with unstructured time. I thrive on deadlines and regular meetings to keep me going. I would never do an online class because I wouldn't be able to work on it methodically and systematically--I'd either do it in big bursts or wait until the last minute.

This is a problem, however, for an aspiring academic. See, now (and in the future), I need to be able to work on my own projects/research/writing without someone setting deadlines for me. I need to be able to sit down and focus everyday on a given task and get it done. I think it's key to being successful in academia--and key to finishing my degree (and staying in my adviser's good graces).

With that in mind, I'm going to attempt to structure my own time and force myself to stick to some sort of schedule. The past couple of days I've been working on reading some scholarship and thinking about my Fall course, and tinkering with other tasks, but not in a structured, concentrated way. I hate feeling unproductive, but I'm having a hard time actually getting much done during my summer days.

Fellow academics, how did you train yourselves to be more disciplined and focus on tasks to be able to accomplish what you want to accomplish?

Three Weeks and Counting

2011-04-25T19:22:00.000-05:00

It's the countdown until the end of the semester. My students feel it (though I think since the snow, they never really got into the semester as they should have), and are responding appropriately. I am trying to schedule all the things I have to finish up before the semester ends and how I can do it without going crazy or overdosing on coffee.

Then...the summer. In which I currently have no plans and no employment. It's weird, a summer without something to do. I still have hopes of securing at least some money over the summer, but prospects aren't good. I'm sure there will be a marked increase in posts here.

Thinking ahead, I've decided I'm going to focus on running better and faster. I'm going to run a 25k (about 15 miles) in July, which means I'd better get on training. One part of my training I always neglect is cross-training. Be it other forms of cardio or strength training, I'm terrible about doing anything a little different.

So, in order to work on healthy habits throughout the summer (which I hope to extend into the semester), I plan on working on a series of small goals. The first? To get 8 hours of sleep a night and to move around every day. Now, moving around doesn't mean working out, but it means taking a walk during the day or something like that. Two fairly simple goals, right?

They seem pretty easy, but it's good to start out small. Plus, the right amount of sleep will really help me out when it comes to dealing with students and grading...and...getting off coffee (which will happen AFTER the semester ends).

Feminist Rant, or We Don't Have to Look Like Supermodels to be Healthy

2011-02-24T14:56:00.000-06:00

Rush Limbaugh is an idiot. I am fully aware of this fact.

Now, usually my approach to idiots is to ignore them. I ran across this post about Limbaugh's latest comments about our amazing First Lady, and my first impulse was to roll my eyes. He called her a hypocrite for eating ribs instead of "roots, berries, and tree bark." Any logical thinking person would realize that healthy people sometimes indulge in their favorite foods (like a cupcake!), and that's all part of being healthy. (And yes, I realize that he is just an old fat man who has no idea what "healthy" means).

That wasn't the thing that got me. It was something else he said, directly attacking Michelle Obama, which I could not in good conscience ignore.

To quote:

"I'm trying to say our first lady does not project the image of women that you might see on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue or of a woman [Yankees star] Alex Rodriguez might date every six months, or what have you," Limbaugh concluded.

Ah, here we have it! What is threatening about Michelle Obama is that she is a powerful, smart, educated black woman who is doing amazing things instead of sitting on the sidelines while her husband leads (ahem, Laura Bush). So if you are an old, fat white man threatened by a powerful woman, what do you attack? Her physical appearance, of course!

Limbaugh can't possibly see that how the First Lady (amazing arms and all) can be a model for healthy eating because she doesn't resemble the waif-like, airbrushed supermodels that he believes is the perfect female body. Even those supermodels don't resemble the magazine covers. Since she's not someone that Alex Rodriguez wants to f*&%, then she's not a good role model, nor is she someone we should listen do. And Limbaugh gets to sneer from his XXL chair that she's a hypocrite and belittle her appearance.

You notice no one goes around critiquing Sam Kass for eating ribs--no one really cares--yet he is a major player in the First Lady's healthy initiative. Why not? Because he's a man, so he is not required by any standards to look like a model. Women, meanwhile, are constantly held to ridiculous standards, and idiots like Limbaugh think its perfectly acceptable to attack THE FIRST LADY of the United States for not looking like sexual object.

Here's the thing, Limbaugh--she is not a sexual object. She is a woman, an intelligent, educated, powerful woman. Her ability to do awesome things in the world is not directly related to her resemblance to a magazine cover or the sorts of women that Alex Rodriquez tends to date (if only he could be so lucky to score a babe like our First Lady). Critiquing her initiative is one thing; attacking her for not living up to an impossible standard of beauty and for not existing to serve as a sexual object for your dirty, nasty gaze is something I will not stand for.

Michelle Obama is the perfect role model for healthy eating. She is not a size 0, and that's why she's so awesome. She has curves and muscles, and isn't afraid to bare her arms to the world. Her husband certainly thinks she's beautiful, and I find her to be a damn classy lady, full of grace and confidence. She is a healthy weight, she knows that part of enjoying life (while being healthy) requires one to eat a damn rib every now and then (or a cupcake), and that one should feel good in her own body.

This is precisely why she is the perfect model for women, young and old. She projects the image of a woman who is comfortable in her skin, who isn't obsessed with attaining an impossible standard of beauty. She isn't afraid to eat a rib every now and then, and she is someone women look to for what we should be. We don't have to accept that our ability to do things in the world and our self-worth is tied to how we look.

And that, my friends, is why we should speak up, even when old, fat white men critique women's appearances. We should speak up and shout them down and tell them we aren't taking any more of their impossible standards. We (women AND men) should scream that we refuse to be reduced to our size or our weight. And we refuse to be told that our self-worth is dependent on our ability to be a sexual object.

Noodles!

2011-02-21T06:40:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago, I stumbled across this recipe on Food in Jars (one of my favorite sites). Hmmm, I thought to myself, This looks pretty delicious. I'll have to try it one night. Last week, that night came. Lance and I were so hungry after working out that we wanted a quick and easy dinner. He boiled noodles and vegetables, and I whipped up the peanut sesame/tahini sauce. Then we ate it all.

The next day I needed a lunch, and I asked Lance to make me noodles once more. I ate them all.

Then, we made them for potluck last night, adding tofu, beet greens, and carrots. Everyone kept going back for more, commenting on how delicious they are.

(You should be picking up on a trend now).

I am now officially obsessed with these noodles. The sauce is infinitely versatile. Lance created some kind of weird fish sauce concoction to add to it that several people at potluck really liked. I'm not a fish sauce fan myself, so I'm sticking with them plain and delicious. (But you might add fish sauce, if you're so inclined).

Add whatever vegetables or proteins you want, or use whatever noodles you want (I like sobas, but they are really good with rice noodles, and I'm sure udon or somen would be equally good). A quick, healthy dinner, all wrapped up in one, provided you don't eat the whole pot or anything.

Incidentally, I'm also eating leftover noodles today for lunch.

Peanut Tahini Noodles
(from Food in Jars)

With two bundles of soba noodles, it makes two generous servings.

2 tablespoons toasted sesame oil
3 1/2 tablespoons soy sauce
2 tablespoons unseasoned rice vinegar
2 tablespoons tahini (sesame paste)
1 tablespoon peanut butter
2 tablespoons honey
1 inch of ginger root, finely minced (we use a garlic press to mince--works great!)
2 garlic cloves, finely minced
1 tablespoon sriracha sauce

Whisk it all together, pour over cooked noodles/vegetables, and NOM.

Jenn Got Married

2011-02-09T10:44:00.000-06:00

Hey guys, I'm a married lady now! It happened in a whirlwind of snow, flurries, ice, and skirts. In the end, it was amazing and perfect--all of our friends and family pitched in to make it an event I'll never forget.

And without further ado (because I know this is what you really want), photos!

Red room!

Bride and groom!

Me and the bridesmaids, who were awesome. The flowers we're carrying are made (by all of us) of felt, hot glue, and flower wire (and ribbon). I'll just take a moment to say I had the BEST bridesmaids. One journeyed far from the northernlands and faced lots of stupid airline crap just to be here. One absorbed bad luck (her shoe broke just hours before the wedding, and then when she figured that all out, she ended up burning her hair). One was bringer of boozes not to mention up early to help decorate. They were all freakin' awesome.

The groomsmen, not be forgotten, were also fantastic. Two travel far--one from Eastern Europe!!--and they all pitched in and helped get everything going, decorating, driving me/other people all around, and just being super cool. Our wedding parties are simply a microcosm of our fantastic group of friends.

I made my veil, which was super fun. The flower is made of silk circles of varying sizes, and I sewed some beads in the middle to give it a little bling (I was looking for some sort of cool piece of jewelry but never found one). The veil itself was a pain, until I finally figured out how to shape it properly--I'm extremely pleased with how it turned out!

The shoes! So amazing! They were great--though, I think because they are really high, they are why I didn't cry during the ceremony, which was so beautiful and perfect.

My dress twirls! (Advantages of a full skirt).

I never thought I'd say it, but my wedding was perfect. Even with all the snow crazies, and with some people unable to travel, we still had a great time and partied hard.

NYE Outfit: Vintage Finery!

2011-01-05T10:00:00.002-06:00

Several months ago, my cool aunt (who is also making my wedding cakes!) scored a sweet find at an estate sale: a vintage dress, in almost perfect shape, for like $2. (FYI: it's always nice to have someone who knows my tastes looking out for me!). When I went to visit in November, she brought the dress out of the closet. I eyed it cautiously for a few minutes because it looked too small for me around the middle. The dress, however, was a lovely shade of pink and looked exactly like something I should own.

In spite of my worries, I tried it on, and even though it was very fitted, I could tell it fit properly. This was, after all, a dress from the era of more fitted dresses and more confining undergarments. I made a few small adjustments to the dress (removed some fading velvet bows and fixed a torn sleeve). I thought about wearing it to Christmas (but opted instead for my red silk Christmas skirt), but ultimately decided that New Year's Eve would be the perfect venue for this lovely dress.

I was also given some lovely vintage jewelry from Lance's grandma (some that I will wear at the wedding!), so I wore that as well. While thrifting the afternoon of NYE, I found a great pair of shoes (for cheap!) that I wore. The best find of all during the thrifting excursion, however, was a lace clutch with matching gloves:

So pretty, and yet so cheap! If only they were white, I could wear them with my wedding dress. I will find other reasons to wear them, never fear.

I felt a bit costumed, but you know what? I felt awesome. There is definitely something to be said about wearing clothes that fit well and make you feel good in them.

Vintage-tastic!

Project Wedding Dress

2011-01-04T22:06:00.001-06:00

Oh, hi there. Remember me? Yeah, I tried to blog a bit more then fell off the face of the earth. However, I am back because I want to tell you all about the pretty wedding dress I'm making. The pictures will be a bit deceiving because I won't share the finished product until after February 5th, but you can see some of the process up until then.

So: this summer, after Lance proposed and I accepted, and after I tried on a few dresses and decided that most things related to commercial weddings made me twitch and itch a little (I think I'm allergic), I decided to make my own dress. This Vogue pattern (originally from 1954!) caught my eye and stuck with me.

So very vintage! With a scooped neck, a full skirt, and a low back! These features drew me toward it. I bought the pattern, then began the practice dress (to make sure the final version would fit before I attempted it). Finals occurred, followed by the holidays (and another wedding to attend), so I finally got around to working on after Christmas. And...it turned out so well:

Well, it would look better if you could see me in it, but you can get the general idea.

So, now that the practice dress is (mostly) done (sans buttons and hemming), I decided to make several modifications to the pattern. There are buttons on the front, but I am moving those to the back. I'm also adding lace. I'm also making the whole dress out of a second-hand dress given to me, so I'm incorporating fun beading into the skirt (that I don't have to do!). Here's the dress I chopped up for parts:

And a close-up of the skirt/beading:

Gotta love recycling!

I'll go into more detail about the modifications I made (and how I did it), but I'm feeling reasonably confident in my sewing skills as of late. Luckily, I do have an awesome seamstress to help me hem it because that's my sewing weakness: my hems always look like a home-ec project whereas the rest of the dress usually looks really great. Guess I'll be working on that skill next!

Next wedding project (after the dress is completed): wedding vests for the boys.

Vegetarian Cure-All Soup

2010-11-13T18:22:00.000-06:00

Lance is the one who first introduced me to homemade miso soup. Since we always have a tub of miso paste in the fridge (and he's actually currently brewing a batch of miso), we eat miso soup fairly regularly. When he is not feeling well, he makes a pot of miso to feel better, and I began doing the same. Miso soup has become my chicken noodle soup--and I think it beats it as a curative, hands down.

I started feeling like I was coming down with a cold a couple of days ago, so Thursday night I made a big pot of miso soup with chard and tofu. With a little added sriracha and a hunk of homemade bread, this soothing brew has helped me fight off the cold. The hot broth helps soothe my throat and the sriracha spiciness keeps my sinus passages clear. I thought I'd share the recipe with you all in case you too are succumbing to late fall/end of semester illnesses.

Spicy Miso Soup with Tofu and Greens

Makes 4 servings

In a saucepan, saute some onion--I used the white bulb from some green onions--in a little olive oil. Add a couple of handfuls of thinly sliced chard (about two big leaves + stems) or other green. Cook until the greens begin to wilt, then add 4 cups of water. Bring to a boil and add 3-4 tbsp miso paste (to taste) and 1/2 block of chopped tofu. Season with pepper and nutritional yeast to taste. (I find the miso salty enough, so I don't add any salt, but if you want more salt, some soy sauce would be good). Add sriracha (aka "rooster sauce") to taste. Top with green onion and eat with a chunk of good bread for a healthy and soothing meal.

Cranky Redux

2010-11-11T17:28:00.001-06:00

1. "Is Emily Dickinson a lesbian?" was the first question out of his mouth. To kick off the discussion of one of my favorite poets, we begin with this question? No. Way. Dr. M. and A (a grad student) moved it to a discussion about gender ambiguity in her poetry and the role of gender (all worthy topics), but I just slapped my forehead in pain, anguish, and exasperation. Why are we so willing to read her poetry through biography? I was in fact so cranky that I wrote my reading journal with a twinge of an attitude (toward the view, not my prof). I wanted to talk about the visual appeal of the poetry (capitalization and dashes, i.e.) and some other things. Cue: pain and frustration.

2. There was going to be Rhet/Comp seminar next semester. Yay, a class in my discipline! Perfect! But, alas, due to the fracas that took place in October, the class was canceled. Cue: woe and despair.

3 I seem to be developing a cold, one week before a draft and a research presentation are due. Cue: further woe and further despair.

4. We counted all the people we should invite, could invite, have to invite. Then we added up out of the almost absolutely bare minimum we have to invite that will come and it added up to more than our space will hold. Lance is measuring to see if we can make it work. Cue: let Lance deal with it for right now...I gotta finish out the semester!

5. Today, something was said (not to me directly or about me directly) that pushed my anger button. I don't really want to go into detail in an online space, but it's nothing too juicy and scandalous, and I might tell you if you ask me personally. Needless to say, it made me cranky. (Cue: crankiness)

6. I like the Romantics as much as anyone: but to the person in my class who insists that art is created from the outpouring of an effluent spring, the divine speaking through the poet, the lightning strike of inspiration, the drugged dream haze: this is not how it works. Even the Romantics knew that. Writing might begin (or contain) little flashes and moments of inspiration, but to make something good, the artist has to think, to have a purpose in creating, and execute with skill. Otherwise any idiot high on pot could write like Coleridge, Wordsworth, Shelley, or [INSERT AUTHOR HERE].

7. The same person also said that great art is never written with an intentional political/social purpose. Puh-lease! (Note: this person is not an artist: she once wrote one poem in one outpouring of emotion, so she bases this on that one experience.)

The non-cranky:
I'm obviously engaged and opinionated in my studies, so I guess that's a good thing?

Teaching

2010-11-04T23:59:00.000-05:00

I found out the other day that I get to teach a class next semester, which excites me greatly.

Today, I taught many, many students (one-on-one) about writing. It made my brain very, very tired.

But...that sense of a job well done...that makes up for the tiredness. I don't know if they really learn that much from a half-hour or hour session, but they seem grateful when they leave, and I like it when they come back and I can see how their writing changes (and improves, sometimes).

I'm grateful for the chance to work with students in the writing center, and I'm grateful for the chance to teach next semester.

And, now, time for bed.

PS: I've started reading Pegasus in my scraps of stolen free-time, and it's awesome.

In Which Jenn Querulously Writes

2010-11-03T15:04:00.000-05:00

I don't know if it's just that time of the semester (where we all need a break) or what, but I'm finding myself becoming crankier. More cantankerous. Querulous, even. So today I shall discuss particular points of complaint.

One: students on campus. Okay, so I know I work at a university and am a student, so I really shouldn't complain about this. However, I'm looking specifically at how students move around on campus. Since I'm on a bike, I'm hyper-aware of my setting (because I want to stay alive to bike another day), but I've noticed that most students don't pay attention to their surroundings. I've almost run students down because they are too busy texting or looking at their feet to remember that they are surrounded by potential obstacles. (FYI: they don't even hear my bike bell.) They also can't walk in a straight line, which makes biking around them surprisingly difficult.

But here is my main complaint: I usually ride on the sidewalk for a short bit, then switch to the roads that run through campus. However, students don't even look before they cross those roads! And I'm not talking about using cross-walks--they just walk. Wherever. Everywhere. And yes, cars do drive on these roads. Today, I almost ran down three students who just randomly crossed in front of me without even looking up. Normally, I would just roll my eyes, but today I scolded them loudly.

These kids seem so lost in their own little words (which I'm sure are infinitely fascinating) that they can't even observe the world around them. This leads me to my next point: individualism is not all it's chalked up to be. Bear with me a minute as I make the connection: we as a nation are obsessed with the individual. Thinking that one is a unique butterfly in a world of unique butterflies leads, in my thinking, to this inability to remember that one exists in spaces with other people. Be considerate. Look around. And watch out for angry girls on bikes.

In Feminist Theory, we keep hitting on this idea of the individual, which frustrates me because, yes, while, we are all individuals with individual experiences, we also exist within a social order, a society, a culture(s), structures, and institutions. We are who we are because of our place in the world, not because of some unique individualism that is inherent to human nature. We love, share, and communicate because we can understand other people: we have shared experiences, thoughts, ideologies, and perspectives. Emphasizing individualism is detrimental to society because we all think we're entitled to step on other people to get to where we want to go instead of trying to work together to make the world a better place. You are not a unique snowflake. Deal with it, and remember that there are other people in the world besides you.

Decision Day

2010-11-02T13:00:00.000-05:00

Yep, it's that time of the year again. I'm going to go vote later (because I'm cool like that), but I thought I'd reflect a little on politics.

In my Feminist Theory class, we've been talking about how a proclamation that one does not have politics is another way of saying that one's political views belong to someone else. Or, if you aren't interested in politics, then politics is interested in you. I'm reasonably interested in politics, but both Lance and I have spent the last few months frustrated: frustrated because it seems that people refuse to listen to reason,that people refuse to consider the other side of an issue, that people are too busy worrying about phantoms to realize that big issues are at stake.

I was excited in 2008 because it seemed like there really was potential for change. It was exciting. And changes have been made, albeit in a more watered down form. This year, I've had a hard time getting excited about any of the candidates. I know who I'm going to vote for (and have good reasons), but it's mostly because I don't like the opposition.

Well, anyway. I don't have too much to say after all, but I hope you all will go out and vote today.

That Grad School Thing

2010-11-01T10:13:00.000-05:00

As everyone expected, I disappeared into a pile of books, notes, and papers as the semester progressed I have reemerged, albeit likely temporarily.

What have I been up to? A list, for your ease of understanding:

Attended and presented at my first academic conference as a PhD student
Began Project Wedding Dress (posts to come, I hope, and pictures)
Ordered the most beautiful wedding shoes
Drank copious amounts of coffee
Gave up drinking copious amounts of coffee
Ran a 5k, placed third in my age group, and earned a new PR (26:03!)
Read pages and pages and pages
Saw two authors of cool books, all within one week
Checked out mountains of books from the library for my research papers
Subbed for a friend's Comp I classes, which was pretty fun
Dressed up like a robot for Halloween
Realized that we have three months until the wedding
Started a paper on feminists and vampires
Bought a plane ticket to Boston for Thanksgiving
Tutored lots of students in writing, which was FUN

Anyway, you get the idea. It has been fun and glorious and I wouldn't give it up for anything. I'm about to have to abandon my social life for the next month or so to get everything done, but I'll emerge on the other side successfully!

On the Sublime

2010-09-29T23:09:00.000-05:00

Are we not, then, to hold that composition (being a harmony of that language which is implanted by nature in man and which appeals not to the hearing only but to the soul itself), since it calls forth manifold shapes of words, thoughts, deeds, beauty, melody, all of them born at our birth and growing with our growth, and since by means of the blending and variation of its own tones it seeks to introduce into the minds of those who are present the emotion which affects the speaker, and since it and by the building of phrase upon phrase raises a sublime and harmonious structure are we not, I say to hold that harmony by these selfsame means allures us and invariably disposes us to stateliness and dignity and elevation and every emotion which it contains within itself, gaining absolute mastery over our minds? (Longinus)

The sublime. We've heard the term bandied about, and those of us who are familiar with underlying ideas of Romanticism will immediately think "Edmund Burke." Well, Longinus thought it first. My intent, however, is not to give a lesson but to urge you to think about what it that writing does to us.

What do words do? When you read, what are the words stirring inside of you? If it sublime, it lifts and inspires heightened emotions. If it's well-written, in inspires loftier things--it "seeks to introduce into the minds of those who are present the motion which affects the speaker." And if it's successful, oh what can it do? These words can create a work that "allures us and invariably disposes us to stateliness and dignity and elevation and every emotion which it contains within itself," and here's the rub: "gaining absolute mastery over our minds".

That, my friends, is why we read literature. To feel that inspiration, that rush of emotion, the elevation of the mind and heart. And why do we study writing and try to teach it? I would hope it would be show our students that writing is powerful and that they too can grasp at least a measure of that power and wield it.

(Party) Dress

2010-09-27T08:38:00.001-05:00

I had an engagement party last weekend (so fun!), so I decided to use some of my precious spare time (read: time I should be reading) to make a new dress. I was at the new fabric store with AW and found a great Burda Style pattern (No. 7517) and some great discount material. The dress only needed 2 yards! To make a whole dress!

Anyway, so after deciding it was worth about $15 to buy pattern/dress (though, after zipper and other materials, probably closer to $20 or $25), I went home and made it. I got quite obsessed with finishing and stayed up until 1 or 2 am, working on it.

It turned out, and it turned out exceedingly well. You see, I actually took the time to carefully measure and resize the pattern to fit me precisely. (It turns out that I'm a mix of three sizes, go figure). The pattern was really good in that it was both easy and had a great size chart so I could figure it all out. I also carefully sewed everything, so all the seams were in place and the zipper wasn't all crooked.

And when I zipped it up, I was surprised and delighted to discover that it fit me perfectly. It was lovely. After the picture was taken, I was able to adjust the front pleats a bit more to lay flatter (no additional sewing required!). I want to make another out of cotton and maybe three more just for the hell of it. It was stylish and wonderful, and it was the perfect thing to wear to a party to celebrate our engagement.

Wedding Planning Recommences!

2010-09-12T19:29:00.000-05:00

Lance and I have been engaged for three months now, but somehow I think we're a little behind on wedding planning. Here are things I have done:

tried on wedding dresses (and ruled out buying one)
obtained a dress to take apart and make mine out of
picked wedding cake recipes for my aunt to make
figured out bridesmaids/groomsmen and officiant

Here are the things we probably should be doing but haven't yet:

set a date (well, we did this once already, but it fell through)
register
figure out a budget
decide dresses/suits/Lance's suit
food
photographer
engagement photos

Luckily, thanks to an awesome friend, we may have figured out where the darn thing is going to be. And now that we've figured out where, we can figure out the when. And the budget. For some reason, so much of our planning was hinging on that not-so-minor decision. Now that we have a where (which I'm really excited about because it's going to be SO COOL. And budget-friendly!), I'm back in wedding planning mode again. Lance and I have decided we're going to try for the cheap-yet-fun wedding award, and we're excited. As you can probably tell from my overuse of the italics.

Let the wedding planning excitement continue! I'm obviously out to make this as much fun as humanly possible instead of aggravating as it too often seems.

Post-Stabbing Shirt

2010-09-11T22:18:00.000-05:00

When you accidentally stab yourself, you need to have a good story. Oh, look. I'm injured. How'd I do it, you ask? Well...that's a great story. You see, there was a puppy, a crazed monkey, and a knife...

Anyway, I stabbed myself yesterday in the arm, near my elbow. Unfortunately, I don't have a great story. Not even really a good story. But here it is: I was washing dishes, and I was reaching around the other side of the dish rack to put a mug down when I clipped the utensil caddy. In an attempt to catch it (while not breaking my mug), I flailed and ended up jamming my arm down hard on the tip of a very sharp paring knife, knocking the utensil caddy on the form and luckily dodging the other two sharp knives while keeping them from piercing my toes. I called Lance in a panic, and he came home to find me in a slight state of shock, drenched in sweat from the adrenaline rush, pressing a paper towel to my bleeding arm.

After he patched me up, Lance finished the dishes while I calmed down and realized that my knife injury now limits my range of motion, meaning I pierced the muscle that controls my hand--thus inhibiting my ability to grasp things well, type, or lift things.

Today, though, I was feeling a bit better, so I decided to do a little sewing. I cut out a pattern for a cute shirt I'd been eyeballing (and had a piece of fabric picked up for super cheap!) Lance came through, and as he has acquired many apples, he wanted me to make him a muslin press bag for his apple press. So I cut out and sewed that, then decided to keep up the craftiness and made this:

It's stretchy and comfy and I really like it. I look forward to wearing it out sometime soon! When I'm less stabbed.

Women and Literary Production

2010-09-08T11:55:00.000-05:00

I'm taking a course in feminist theory this semester, so I thought I'd share some of my reading journal from this week (we're reading from Feminist Literary Theory: A Reader, edited by Mary Eagleton):

When men control the means of written production, how is a woman to speak publicly? Chapter 2 is concerned primarily with women and literary production: how it has been limited by men, by feminism, by society. Eagleton indicates these factors kept women from speaking out, and if they did, often their writing was viewed as inferior to men’s. The two excerpts from Woolf—Shakespeare’s sister and killing the Angel of the House—deal with the difficulties of being a woman who longs to write and wishes to write about her experiences in a woman’s body, but is prevented from doing so: either prevented from writing at all or from writing about ideas that are considered “improper.” Olsen looks at the silencing of women, which begins at birth and prevents their entry into the class of writers.
Eagleton’s introduction to Chapter 2 got me thinking about modern means of production, especially the Internet. Women are among the most active writers on the Internet, with the advent of “mommy blogs” and other communities created by women for women. Each year, a conference is held for female bloggers (called BlogHer), where they meet and mingle and discuss issues about being a woman and being a public writer. Many of these bloggers are given opportunities to write books based on their blogs, meaning more women are producing books. While blogging seems empowering for women, since the means of production is removed from male hands, I have to wonder if this trend is simply another way to keep women writing only about “female” concerns: being a mother, cooking, housekeeping, etc. And obviously among female bloggers there are a good number who are concerned with feminist undertakings (blogs like Jezebel and Feministing, for example) and publish books that question the status quo (I’m thinking, for example, about a book by Jessica Valenti called The Purity Myth, which examines the American obsession with women’s virginity and how it ultimately damages women). Anyway, are we moving toward a time when women’s writing isn’t viewed as inferior to men’s or women are pushed toward writing about stereotypically female concerns, or does the growth in women writing on the Internet contribute to these trends? Perhaps, as Woolf says, “So accurately does history repeat itself” (77).

Computers

2010-09-02T22:06:00.000-05:00

Today, I found the TA computer lab, to which I have a key. It was exciting because I ended up hanging out with a bunch of other graduate students and not doing any work. But there was the potential to do work, oh yes. I did print a couple of things. And e-mailed cake recipes to my aunt for the wedding I'm supposed to be planning.

Since quitting my job, I'm sitting at the computer a LOT less. Which means all my sharebros on Google Reader are seeing a lot fewer recipes and cats in their shared items. What it also means is that I'm moving around more and seem to be embarking on a successful graduate school diet, mostly because my graduate school friends are too poor to afford chocolate to share with me, so my sugar consumption has been way down since I also cannot afford chocolate. I'm also biking to school daily--going on three weeks straight now.

Since I'm not on the computer as much, I'm relying on my phone for e-mail and Facebook. But since the screen is very tiny, I'm not fond of staring at it too long, so I glance at it every now and then and return to work.

I am, however, going to be spending a lot of time on the computer tonight and tomorrow. Because I have to do research. It would seem that my computer-time will now be spent in the pursuit of more knowledge. Right now, I'm looking at programs that teach science and literacy together--how interesting! It seems that I cannot escape my science peeps.

It's raining, and I'm at the computer. Time to do some science reading and head to bed.

P.S. Graduate school rocks.

Back to School!

2010-09-01T23:26:00.000-05:00

It was the first day: I eagerly waited outside my classroom door, waiting for class to start. When it did, the fifty minutes flew by so quickly that I was stunned when class was completed. The next day were the same: a flurry of notes and discussion and talking to professors about my new roles as a first year Ph.D. student.

I'm really excited to be starting back to school, and I've been reading and thinking and doing, and it's not even the end of the second week. I'm no longer working at my old job; instead, my job now is to learn and think and write and research. And I'm beyond happy.

I got a desk in an office, and I like my officemates. I've already had discussions about Orientalism, Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, cultural misunderstandings, and teaching techniques. I've been learning about classical rhetoric (so fascinating!), how to teach freshman composition (also really interesting!), and feminist theory (I'm liking this one a lot too). It's all really interesting, and even though I may be working longer days than eight-to-five, it flies by. I come home energized, telling Lance all about Bahktin and his dialogical theories and how neat rhetorical theory is.

If I had any doubt that I was meant to be an academic, it was erased during the first week as the joy of being in school washed through me. But it's not just about being in school; no, it's about being in the position to focus solely on academic pursuits. My work ties into my studies. I'm tutoring in the writing center, which is in line with my interests in teaching and researching pedagogy. The projects that I'm working on for my adviser also tie into those interests. Working full-time while going to school was difficult, and though I was lucky to be able to get into a good place financially before starting a Ph.D. program, I know I missed so much during my MA program by not being a full-time student. This time, it's for real. I'm a student all the way, and I'm fully immersing myself in the culture of academia and the mindset of being a scholar.

Weekday Pancakes

2010-07-21T11:22:00.000-05:00

I love pancakes. My love of pancakes has been previously documented here and here (and probably some other places). Now, pancakes are normally a weekend, slow-day kind of breakfast, but I woke up and wanted, nay, needed pancakes. And I had bananas. Banana pancakes!

Joy the Baker loves pancakes every bit as much as I do, so I searched her site and came up with her Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes. Yum. So I whipped them up quickly this morning, and as I was getting ready for work, Lance cooked them. (Go team!) Together, we made lovely pancakes and shared them with another, and it was on a weekday. Sometimes you just have to have pancakes on a weekday, and it makes the day a little more special.

I modified the recipe a bit (based on what I had in my kitchen), but these pancakes were things of beauty. They were fluffy and delicious and ranked near my favorite oatmeal pancake in deliciousness and texture. I may have to make these again, because they were that good.

Banana Buckwheat Pancakes
(adapted from Joy the Baker, who adapted it from The Gourmet Cookbook

3/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup buckwheat flour
1/3 cup cornmeal
1 tbsp sugar
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 large eggs, separated
1 1/2 cup buttermilk
1/4 cup canola oil
1 1/2 ripe bananas, mashed

In a large bowl, combine flours, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder/soda, salt, egg yolks, and buttermilk. Stir (but don't overmix! Use your dough whisk!) and let sit for at least 5 minutes to hydrate the flours.

In a small bowl, mash banana and add oil. Add to the flour mixture.

Beat the egg whites until fluffy. Gently fold into the batter. If it's a little thick (mine was) add some more milk or water.

Cook them in a skillet and devour.

I'm Sticking With You

2010-07-10T07:17:00.001-05:00

In my transition to someone who would major in English, I encountered this John Donne poem:

THE GOOD-MORROW

I wonder by my troth, what thou, and I
Did, till we lov'd? were we not wean'd till then?
But suck'd on countrey pleasures, childishly/
Or snorted we in the seaven sleepers den?
T'was so; But this, all pleasures fancies bee.
If ever any beauty I did see,
Which I desir'd , and got, t'was but a dream of thee.

And now good morrow to our walking soules,
Which watch not one another out of feare;
For love, all love of other sights controules,
And makes one little roome, an every where.
Let sea-discoverers to new worlds have gone,
Let Maps to other, worlds on worlds have showne,
Let us possesse one world, each hath one, and is one.

My face in thine eye, thine in mine appeares,
And true plaine hearts do in the faces rest,
Where can we find two better hemispheares
Without sharpe North, without declining West?
What ever dies, was not mixt equally;
If our two loves be one, or, thou and I
Love so alike, that none do slacken, none can die.

I love the emotion expressed throughout this poem. It is intense passion, the joy of finding an awaking of soul in another person--in finding that one lacked, but simply didn't realize it until the speaker met his love. Donne is well known for being a physical poet; he evokes the senses. In this poem, the lovers are lying in bed, in their "one little roome," gazing so intently that they see each other in the other's eye. Instead of saying that they find themselves reflected in each other's heart or something non-physical, he gives us that lovely image, where they literally see. Their love is so intense that they can lose themselves in one another (and, knowing Donne, he means emotionally and sexually), and their tiny bedroom is "an every where."

Donne is one of my favorite poets, and I've enjoyed his poetry since I was a high-school senior; my AP English teacher's use of him to show how intense and full of meaning poetry can be is one reason that I became an English major.

I liked this poem, but after Lance and I had been dating for a while, it suddenly made more sense. I could understand the intensity of the speaker, feel a love that makes one feel like the world wasn't complete until that person appeared. There is no worrying about the future in Donne's poem; he simply seeks to capture one little moment full of love, passion, and joy.

All of this discussion of love and great poetry is my long-winded way of announcing that Lance and I are engaged (though most of my readers probably know by now from other sources). I was happy to be a girlfriend, but I'm excited to move into a new phase of our relationship as fiancée and wife. I'm not sure I could ask for a better partner, and I'm so glad that six years ago I tagged along with some friends to a party where I first met this cute curly-headed guy and tried to get his attention by playing four-square and smiling. We have made our own little world with one another, and the possibilities of the future are endless.

For the Love of Kittens

2010-07-09T16:22:00.000-05:00

A. shared an article about kittens adopted by soldiers in Afghanistan. And it was more adorableness than I could stand. I'm glad when defenseless creatures find good homes, and I have to hope they give something to those soldiers as well.

Which then reminded me about the wee little kitty in our home. You would not believe how much better she is. She was listless and sleepy when we first got her (we realize now that she likely would have died if we hadn't rescued her), but just one week later, and she's eating enthusiastically, playing, pouncing around, begging for love, and just being as adorable as a tiny cat can be.

We're still hoping to find her a home. She's got a sweet personality, but she still has a tiny feral streak and gets occasionally a little freaked out by random things. She's taken to following us around though, and doesn't seem to mind one bit when I scoop her up and carry her around.

Yes, I know it sounds like I'm attached, but who wouldn't be?

At least we haven't named her. I hope that her new owners find her soon--she needs a good home. We'd keep her, but we have two cats already, and one is very angry about the new kitten (she, in fact, has an "anger box" where she goes to sulk about the tiny cat). If you are (or know!) anyone who would be a good fit for this little rescue cat, let me know!

Rescue Mission

2010-06-29T12:43:00.000-05:00

I have a soft spot for the less fortunate. I try to do my part, donate money and time and resources where I can, and hope that it's enough. Mostly, I think I should do more.

Two weekends ago, we were visiting Lance's grandmother. She has a stray cat population that she (more or less grudgingly) has been feeding and sheltering. Lance's mom has been doing her best to find homes for the tamer ones and spay/neuter the ones she can catch so that the cat herd thins out a bit. Kittens still turn up, however, and we'd noticed two cute little tabbies. Upon closer inspection, it appeared that the smallest one was sick--she had a respiratory infection, gunky eyes, and was gaunt because she was too small to compete with the bigger kitties (including her littermate) for food. I pleaded with Lance for us to take her to the vet, but he thought she would probably get better without our help.

Last weekend, we went up, and she wasn't better. In fact, she was probably worse--and when Lance felt her tiny little ribs sticking out, he decided we could do our best to get her well, on the condition that we find her a new home (so, if you're near me: free kitty!). I took her to the vet yesterday, and she has an upper respiratory infection, as suspected, as well as suffering from fleas, dehydration, diarrhea, and possibly some other things. The poor thing weighed in at 1.5 pounds (her brother is almost twice her size) and sat hunched over and looking pretty miserable and pathetic. She didn't even fight me as we took her home, then took her back and forth from the vet.

We anticipate that under our care (and antibiotics) that she'll start to get better and go on to be a happy kitty. This is the fifth cat that I've rescued or helped to rescue (I kept two of them), so I feel pretty good about helping out tiny, defenseless animals. Especially when they grow up to be such awesome kitties:

Then I got to thinking about the time and resources I was using to rescue animals. Wouldn't it better to use it to help people? my conscience dinged. That was troubling. By choosing to spend $40 on a sick kitten, was I saying that people who are in desperate need aren't as worthy as a kitten? Wouldn't the time I spent nursing the kitten back to health be better spent volunteering to help people?

Ultimately, I don't know. Maybe I'm not directing my energies in the right direction. Maybe what matters is that I'm trying to help a suffering creature, even if she is just a kitten. I don't think it's a matter of rating animals higher than people; instead, it's a matter of taking responsibility for creatures we domesticated and who wouldn't necessarily thrive (let alone survive) without human interaction. And I'm sure this tiny kitten will bring something special to her future owner's life.

In Which I Resolve to Speak My Mind

2010-06-21T15:20:00.000-05:00

It had been almost a year since I had an actual conversation with my dad. Due to a series of announcements, misunderstandings, misfires in communication, and a general reluctance to simply deal with our issues, the last time I talked to my dad was Father's Day 2009. It's been a tough year.

I've been angry, sad, unhappy, annoyed, resolved, and myriad other adjectives about the whole situation. I doubt that everything is fixed, really, but I think we're finally making a start. We cried, laughed, apologized, and talked for two hours. I got off the phone emotionally drained, but optimistic.

The one thing I've realized after wading through our reasons for how we dealt with each other is that I need to be more assertive. If you met me ten years ago (or even five), you'd realize that I'm much more assertive than I used to be. But I need to be bold, be unafraid to speak my mind, and stand up for myself. They (my parents and others) may not like what I have to say, but I think that being upfront and honest is the best way to handle a lot of situations. Things get ugly, I've discovered, when people don't communicate and deal with problems. By speaking my mind, the other party has the opportunity to voice theirs and perhaps clear the air, instead of sulking and having the wrong ideas about the situation.

It was easy to blame them for a lot, but I have to take a bit of responsibility myself and admit that I was afraid to directly confront some of the issues. I honestly didn't think they would listen--or I thought they did listen and just weren't interested in what I had to say. And part of that is true. I can't expect everyone to handle situations the same way I do, and I can't expect them to confront something. Sometimes, they need to be forced to confront it.

Anyway, I'm glad the situation is changing, at the very least, and hopefully it'll be a change for the better. And I am learning that I should just be strong and speak my mind, even if it's a little uncomfortable. Of course, speaking my mind doesn't mean I should be tactless or undiplomatic. I'm just thinking about it as good practice for both life and my future career.

First Jam of the Year

2010-06-12T19:10:00.001-05:00

Lance picked blueberries last week. We also picked black raspberries from a friend's yard (and got attacked by chiggers. Ack.) Since berries either need to be frozen or dealt with quickly and we are berry-rich, I decided to make a quick jam. Using my favorite canning book, Well Preserved, I looked up blueberry recipes and came across both a blueberry chutney (which I'll make later) and the Black and Blue Jam, which I made this afternoon.

It was hot, but luckily it came together quickly on the stove. I love using my enameled cast iron dutch oven as a jam pot:

After cooking the jam for 20 minutes or so, I put it into jars. It made three 8-oz jars and one 12-oz (or maybe 16?) jar:

It was very good on a cracker:

And now it's time for me to get ready for the 80's pubcrawl in honor of CB's going away to grad school! I actually made my top for it, which I'm very excited about. I'll post more pictures of my outfit tomorrow--it involves a 20-year old crimping iron and an outfit that may double for a robot costume at a later date. A sneak peek:

Oh yeah, recipe.

Black & Blue Jam

(adapted from Well Perserved by Mary Anne Dragan)

3 cups black raspberries (original calls for blackberries)
3 cups blueberries
4 cups sugar
1/4 cup + 2 tbsp lemon juice (about 2 lemons's worth)
zest from one lemon

Put the berries and sugar in your jam pot. Using a potato masher, crush the berries. Let sit at least one hour. Add lemon juice and zest.

Prepare the preserving jars by sterilizing the jars, lids, and rings in a pot of boiling water. While the water is boiling to sterilize the jars, bring the berries/sugar/lemon to a boil over medium-high heat. Boil rapidly for 15-20 minutes, stirring often. The mixture will get dark and thick. (If desired, test the set by dropping a little on a plate that has been in the freezer. If it gets thicker as it cools and hold its set, then it's ready!)

Remove from the heat, stir, and skim off the foam (if necessarily). Pour the jam into the sterile jars, leaving a 1/4-in head space. Wipe rims clean and seal according to manufacturer's directions. Process the jars in a boiling water bath (your sterilization pot is perfect and already hot!) for 10 minutes. Remove from bath and let cool. Lids should seal as the jars cool

What to Eat

2010-06-10T11:32:00.001-05:00

Remember last September when I decided to be a vegetarian? I have, with a few exceptions, stuck to it. I don't crave meat; in fact, I sometimes find the thought of eating meat a little repulsive (which is the reason I started in the first place).

Lately, I've found myself more firmly in the vegetarian camp, identifying more with a vegetarian lifestyle. I've even been flirting a little with vegan cooking, thanks to a fun cookbook called Veganomicon. I love the cookbook, and while I have no intentions on being a vegan (no yogurt? no buttermilk? too much smugness?), I think that there are health and environmental benefits to be had from generally consuming fewer animal products, not just eschewing meat.

Just as I'm starting to identify more strongly with the vegetarian lifestyle, I run across a review about a book called The Butcher and the Vegetarian. Written by Tara Austen Weaver of Tea & Cookies, the book is about how after being told that she should eat meat by her doctors because she struggled with chronic fatigue, she decides to explore the world of meat. She is scared of giving herself food poisoning, cooking it poorly, or just not knowing what to do with meat because she grew up a vegetarian. Basically, she moves in the opposite direction of most folks who, like me, become vegetarians after growing up eating meat.

The book was an enjoyable exploration of the moral implications of eating meat: she ends up seeking out farmers who strive to produce meat that comes from an animal that is treated like an animal (and not a product) and is slaughtered humanely. I found these parts the most interesting because I started eating less meat because of this very issue, and it's one reason I cite if people ask me why I'm a vegetarian.

Weaver also struggles with the guilt she feels about eating meat: she truly enjoys it, especially when she learns about charcuterie (preserved meats) and meets individuals who are passionate (and talented) about cooking meat. But her mother and vegetarian background play the angel to her meat-enjoying devil, and she spends a good deal of the book wrestling with those issues. She started trying to eat meat to improve her health, but when research shows that a vegetarian or vegan diet is usually the most healthful, she has to wonder: will eating meat really make her healthier and happier?

Ultimately, she finds that a mostly raw food diet is the cure to her fatigue and illness. But she still eats small bites of meat here and there and cooked food--she understands that she found the key to what made her healthy and happy within herself. Food choices often boil down to that: what works for the individual and her own convictions. Weaver concludes:

How we feed ourselves is an intensely personal act. It brings together all manner of family and cultural traditions, issues of health--both our own and those of the world at large--and the simple fact that we want to be delighted by what we eat; we want to be satisfied and comforted. Right or wrong, in a world that sometimes has sharp edges, food is often our solace.

We cook our food, we eat for pleasure as well as for sustenance, and this is part of the problem. Michael Pollan is right: Our food choices present a dilemma. For us, what to have for dinner will always be complicated. Do we eat for our palate, for our health, for the planet? Can we have it all?...

We also don't live in a meritocracy. Those who do a good job conserving resources don't get to advance to the next level while the wastrels get held back. We're all in this together--vegetarians, vegans, and carnivores. We're sitting at the same dining table. The problems we face in regards to health, planet, and increasingly limited resources are ours. They are ours to fix, or ours to flub. I'm hoping we can fix them.

This is what my decision to be a vegetarian boils down to. I've realized that I'm healthier and happier when I'm eating lots of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and a bit of dairy here and there, and I feel bad (and gain weight) when I eat lots of meat, processed foods, sugar, and fat. My diet works for me and what my body needs. I don't expect Lance to ever give up meat--nor would I ask him to--and he makes his own choices based on what he enjoys and feels good about eating. (He ends up eating mostly vegetarian too, but has been known to cook himself a piece of venison or pork when he's in the mood for it). And sometimes he makes bacon-wrapped tofu:

Eating is an intensely personal choice, which is why some meat-eaters get up in arms about vegetarians and vegans, and why some vegetarians/vegans adopt an attitude of moral superiority and smugness about their dietary choices. In the end, however, it simply comes down to what you want to eat and what you feel good about eating--and sometimes, it really is okay to eat a butter-filled cupcake or a piece of bacon.

Handy Kitchen Tools

2010-06-09T20:29:00.000-05:00

I have a running group that meets on Thursdays to run. I've brought treats a couple of times, and when I was at the half-marathon last weekend, one of the guys asked for baked goods this week. I had bananas in the freezer that I accidentally let thaw partially, so they were no good for banana soft-serve (try it! seriously!), so I decided to bake banana-black raspberry muffins.

I would give you all the recipe, but I sorta made it up based on the Basic Muffin Recipe in Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything Vegetarian. (I really should measure things, but I am so lazy). I'm not going to give you all a recipe, but I am going to talk about one of my favorite kitchen tools: the dough whisk.

But first, a picture of Neko, who jumped onto the stool in the kitchen to get attention (on top of my cookbook). We have trained her using peanut butter (yes, she loves peanut butter), so she associates the stool with petted, food, or treats

I first heard about the dough whisk from Chocolate & Zucchini. Intrigued, I decided to buy one for Lance and his brother for Christmas one year. They both bake lots of bread. I figured if a French woman with a tiny kitchen recommended it, then maybe it wasn't too gimmicky.

Lance and his brother both praised it as very useful indeed. Since I usually leave the bread baking to Lance, I ignored it, content that Lance used it and liked it. Until I started using it to mix the wet and dry ingredients for muffins and quick breads.

It's marvelous. It works 1000 times better than a regular whisk or a rubber spatula. AND it doesn't have dough sticking to it--the batter slides off easily and quickly. I use it to whisk together dry ingredients:

And then to mix the wet and dry together.

You know how muffin/quick bread/cake recipes always admonish you to not "overmix" or DOOM will befall your baked treat? Well, this dough whisk gently combines the ingredients. No overmixing!

And you know how if you mix something by hand, inevitably (even while risking the dreaded overmixing!) you miss some flour or something on the bottom? Well, the dough whisk really gets it all. No more flour spots lurking in the middle of your perfectly whisked batter.

If you find yourself making lots of muffins, pancakes, bread, etc, I would heartily recommend adding this to your kitchen tools. Get rid of something pointless like one of those crappy whisks, if you have a small kitchen. You won't regret it.

I'll leave you with an image of another well-used tool in my kitchen: the 1/2 cup ice cream scoop:

PERFECT for measuring out muffin batter. And absolutely dead-on for the amount of cupcake batter you should portion out into each cup, as I mentioned yesterday. Another tool well-worth the cost and drawer space!

Where to Start?

2010-06-08T22:05:00.001-05:00

I have several posts in mind. When that happens, it usually means I can't choose what to write about, so I write about nothing.

I had another half-marathon last weekend in Kansas City. Which originally was going to be my topic for tonight's post...but then I realized I'd rather talk about cupcakes.

I have a passion for cupcakes. You would think that I run just to be able to consume the cupcakes that I bake, and you would not be completely wrong. Luckily, my cupcakes are such an undertaking (and as it grows warmer, it has to be a Very Special Occasion for me to bake in a non-air conditioned kitchen) that I can outrun the butter and sugar. Just barely.

I realized that I had not yet posted my last cupcake baking endeavor. I believe they were from a weekend in April, a birthday party batch. A very fun birthday party, in fact, thrown by AB for her husband. Cupcakes being my thing, I offered to bake them. (I always do love an excuse to try a new recipe).

It all started when I made cookies. I was meeting up with some people and wanted to bring something to nibble on, so I baked Coffee and Walnut Splodge Cookies, straight from Nigella Lawson's How to Be a Domestic Goddess to their mouths. (CB declared, "You brought noms!" which made me unspeakably happy.) They were so delicious: rich, nutty, not too sweet--a great cookie. I never would have thought to blend coffee and walnuts, and they were pretty much perfect, unified by butter and love.

So, I had walnuts and coffee on my mind. When I made the Super Special Birthday Cake, I had encountered a Walnut Layer Cake with a Coffee Buttercream in Regan Daley's incomparable In the Sweet Kitchen, which begged me to bake it. PLEADED. But I had been asked for a CHOCOLATE/coffee combination, not walnut/coffee, so I simply used that fabulous, beautiful Coffee Buttercream to frost the SSBC. And kept that walnut cake in my baking queue.

The cupcakes, I decided, would be that cake. The frosting would be that Coffee Buttercream. But what garnish?

I feel that cupcakes (and cakes, for that matter) should always have some special touch. If you make a carrot cupcake with cream cheese frosting, how about candying some carrot pieces to top it? (For example).

I was home alone that weekend, so I made myself a special lunch (curried bok choy, asparagus, pumpkin, and tofu over soba noodles), complete with a glass of wine and dessert.

I had bought some beautiful strawberries at the farmers' market that morning, so I chopped a few up, threw some orange juice on them, then topped them with two of the leftover walnut/coffee cookies. The tart of the strawberries meshed perfectly with the dense/dark flavor of the cookies, and I knew had my my garnish.

I proceeded with the Walnut Cupcakes with a Coffee Buttercream, Garnished with Strawberries, and this is what emerged:

They were so beautiful. I was pleased with myself enormously. These, these cupcakes. They would be perfect for a birthday celebration. I happily loaded them up and headed to the party.

And they went over very well. In fact, L and D (who are both firmly Team Cake) had looks of pure pleasure on their faces as they bit into the cupcakes. Later in the night, partygoers decided to make a cupcake sandwich, and were pleased with the results.

It took me long enough to post them, but don't you think they were worth the wait?

But first....
Walnut-Espresso Cookies
(from Nigella Lawson's How to Be a Domestic Goddess

1-2/3 cups flour (you might mix all-purpose with whole wheat pastry, if you like)
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup + 2 tbsp unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup sugar
1/4 cup light brown sugar
2 tbsp instant espresso powder (Indispensable for baking! Buy it!)
2 large eggs, beaten
generous 3/4 cup/7 oz. walnuts, chopped

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Mix together the flour, baking powder, and salt. In a separate mixing bowl, cream the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy. Add the espresso powder, then the eggs. Stir in the flour mixture and walnuts. Don't overmix or you'll be sad.

Using a small ice cream scoop, scoop onto lined cookie sheets (or a baking stone), about 2 inches apart. Bake for 12 minutes until they are golden and smell really, really good. Cool. Eat.

Now for the main feature! (Please do not be frightened by the obscene amounts of butter in the cupcakes/buttercream. They are for SPECIAL occasions, which ALWAYS calls for obscene amounts of butter. And wine, beer, or whiskey/gin.)

Walnut Cupcakes topped with Coffee Buttercream

(see this post for the Coffee Buttercream recipe)

1-1/2 cups unsalted butter (yes, that's 3 sticks of butter)
1-1/2 cups sugar
4 large eggs, at room temperature
2 tbsp pure maple syrup (Grade B or C, if you're being picky)
1 tsp pure vanilla extract
1 cup finely ground walnuts (this is when you really love your food processor)
2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp salt

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and prepare the pans with cupcake papers (or two 9-in rounds, if you're anti-cupcake. If you are, then GET OUTTA HERE. *ahem* Carry on.).

Sift the flour (which I actually did for once), baking powder and salt together in a bowl and set aside.

In the bowl of your mixer with the paddle attachment (or a big bowl if you're a hand-mixer type), cream the butter and the sugar until pale and fluffy. Add the eggs one at a time, beating well and scraping the sides of the bowl after each egg. Beat in the maple syrup and vanilla, then mix in the walnuts. Add the flour mixture to the mixing bowl in three additions, mixing just enough to moisten the flour between each. Fold the last addition in by hand with a large rubber spatula.

Using a large scoop (known as my muffin scoop--1/2 cup capacity, I think), fill the cupcake papers 2/3-3/4 full. Bake until done (I know, I know, so vague), something over 20 minutes, being careful not to overbake or they will be dry. Let cool completely.

Frost with coffee buttercream, garnish with strawberries, and share with lots of people because I don't want to be responsible for any heart attacks.

Small Potatoes

2010-06-03T11:52:00.000-05:00

Every Sunday, we go to a potluck. I love it. We're a creative bunch who likes to experiment with foods and flavors, and it's always fun to see what the other people will bring. We sometimes have themes to help us pick what to make. I feel like it's made me a better cook, even if it's not so good for my waistline sometimes, especially when S gets carried away with the butter and cheese, which is often.

Since last weekend was Memorial Day weekend, the "theme" was grilling. And while I'm not much of a grill-person (because Lance takes it over, and I'm more than happy to let him do so), I decided to focus my attentions on a salad of some sort. I had gobs of greens from the garden that desperately needed using, so I started thinking of a potato salad.

Now, if you're into potato salads, you will know that there are lots of different philosophies and approaches. Some like there's covered in mayonnaise. Some vehemently argue for an oil/vinegar/herb dressing. Pesto makes an interesting alternative. Personally, I'll eat it as long as it tastes good. My prerequisites are: enough salt and bite from vinegar or pickles (so many potato salads are bland, bland, bland) and lots of flavor. You can leave those boring, plain salads at home. I also usually prefer them nice and chilled.

I was in a bit of a time crunch, however, (we were just returning from Lance's grandmother's) so I know that I wouldn't have time to make a chilled salad. A warm potato salad, perhaps? With lightly cooked chard and beet greens? And some boiled eggs to bulk it up a bit? What if I roast the potatoes with some garlic and onion? I thought and thought, and came up with an unusual combination of textures and flavors.

It may not be pretty, but it was freakin' delicious.

I'm not a huge mayonnaise fan, though I will eat food with mayonnaise in it. Subsequently, we don't usually have it in the house, so I had to figure out some other way to dress my salad. What about the tahini-yogurt sauce recipe I'd made for some falafels a few weeks ago? I'd been eating the leftover on salads, and it was delightful: tangy, garlicky, and lemony, with a rich depth from the tahini. Oh, yes.

I tasted it, and decided that it needed a bit more bite: pickles. Since I was completely off track from a traditional potato salad, I used my homemade dilly beans (yes, there will be a post when I make this year's batch because OH MY GOD they are awesome) and some of the dilly vinegar. Next time I'll add a bit more (I was trying to keep it light on the vinegary taste for a vinegar-hater). The end result? A keeper. Everyone gobbled it up and demanded that next time I put in more dilly beans. And here's the recipe.

Warm Potato and Greens Salad

~1 lb new potatoes (I used a mix of red and gold. I also have no idea how many I used, so...)
1/2 onion, chopped
several cloves of garlic, peeled and cut into halves/quarters if especially large
olive oil spray (or just a glug)
chard and beet greens (or just chard), chopped. (I eat stems and all. Stems have a nice crunch)
4 eggs, boiled, peeled and chopped
pickles, chopped (dills preferred).
vinegar from pickles, to taste
salt, pepper, nutritional yeast*, to taste
tahini-yogurt sauce (recipe to follow)

Preheat oven to 425. Wash and chop the potatoes into bite size pieces. Spread on a cookie sheet with onion and garlic, and spray over with olive oil (or toss lightly in a bowl, then spread on cookie sheet). Place in oven until brown and potatoes are cooked to preferred texture, stirring occasionally.

Meanwhile, cook the chard/beet greens: chop the greens, stems and leaves (some people don't eat the stems. I say "fools"). Heat a little oil in a skillet or pot and toss in the greens. Stir until they start to get bright. Add some water and cover to let them steam, stirring occasionally. They won't cook for too long because both chard and beet greens are more tender than, say, kale or collards.

When the potatoes are done, put into a big bowl and toss with the greens, egg, pickles, tahini-yogurt sauce, pickle vinegar, and seasonings. Taste and adjust flavors.

Tahini-Yogurt Sauce

(adapted from the estimable Mark Bittman's How To Cook Everything Vegetarian)

1/2 c. yogurt
1/2 c. tahini with oil
2-4 cloves garlic (the more garlic, the better in my book)
juice from 1 lemon
salt/pepper
parsley

In a food processor, toss all the ingredients and let it go until combined. Taste and adjust flavors.

(My version for the salad was heavy on the salt since it needed it to season the potatoes. It also makes an excellent sauce for many, many other things, including salads, Greek food, etc).

*I frequently flavor with nutritional yeast. It adds a little extra something delicious that I love.

A Dud

2010-05-31T22:28:00.000-05:00

I was starting to think that all the HPER classes were pretty decent. Sure, I have enjoyed some more than others, but I hadn't encountered one yet that I couldn't wait to leave.

Friday, my readers, I found that class.

In an attempt to combine socializing with working out, I made plans with a friend to go workout at lunch. "Core Yoga" or "Hard Core Abs/Booty Burn"? I inquired. She wanted to do the abs/booty class, so I made plans to meet up with her and walk down to the HPER.

We got there, and I dashed to my locker to grab an elastic band for my hair. When I got back, she'd saved me a spot and grabbed equipment for me (what a great pal!), and the room was packed. Then we started.

It was okay, at first. Then it just got...complicated. I know that I need to work on building up strength, but I quickly realized my inability to do most of the poses was not exactly my fault. The number of people failing to understand the instructor or to hold the poses was more than half. Some of the moves were straightforward and effective, but many were unnecessarily complicated and possibly dangerous for inexperienced students. There were props everywhere when one or two would have sufficed.

At the end of the half hour, we were both frustrated and incredibly annoyed by the instructor and the class. Sure, I felt like I worked my abs (and they were sore a few days later), but I didn't enjoy the experience. I didn't want to stay for the second class, and after seeing some of the props being added in addition to the ones already out, K decided she didn't want to stay either.

I want to try the class again, but with another instructor. Part of good instruction is being able to see that your class is struggling and make adjustments accordingly. Sure, she was in shape, but she didn't do much to help us get there and enjoy the process.

Pilates or Yoga--You Don't Have to Choose!

2010-05-26T14:03:00.000-05:00

Occasionally, there are minor turf wars between Pilates acolytes and yogis: they both use mats and have some focus on breath and stretching, but the goals are often different. Well, at least I have different goals when I do Pilates than when I do yoga. The yogis glare at the Pilates folk with their focus on core and their occasional use of weird rings and other props, while the Pilates people might consider yoga to be not as good a strength workout. Or something. Personally, I'm okay with both, though I really like Ashtanga yoga the best.

Recently, it's become a trend to blend different approaches to exercise. Can't pick between Pilates or yoga--take a PiYo class! I find the name a little ridiculous, but agree with it in spirit. (Another class offered is "Yolates". Ha!)

This week's new fitness class is PiYo, offered midday. (I really like these lunchtime classes. They get me out of my office for a longish walk, and I return so very hungry, thus adding enjoyment to my lunch. There's nothing like an appetite to make food taste even better). Taught by Stacey, the class is "a faster paced yoga class. Experience an athletic fusion of style, strength, and flexibility." Sure, whatever. Again, the class was small (six students), but my overall verdict was that it was enjoyable.

Initially, I was a little disgruntled because the music was a bit loud and the instructor wasn't giving clear instructions, but then she turned down the music and the instructions were much better. The class itself was a mix of yoga, Pilates, and some ballet moves--I could tell that the instructor was most likely a dancer, and at least one of the students was too. I definitely felt like I was working my muscles and stretching, which I liked. There were also lots of balancing poses, and since I need to work on balance, it added a good dimension to my workout.

I may have said it before, but I prefer strength exercises that don't use weights. So if you prefer lots of weights, this class probably wouldn't be one you'd like. I, however, enjoyed the opportunity to escape my office, get in a good walk, and get a light workout in at lunch. While I was a little sweaty, I wasn't dripping and dried off quickly so that I didn't have to worry about showering or anything before returning to work, making it an ideal midday workout.

The Pleasures of Spring

2010-05-24T10:30:00.000-05:00

Nothing signals spring to me quite like ripe strawberries and asparagus. I anxiously await asparagus season, which is far too brief, snatching up the crisp bundles like sacred relics. Nothing is better than fresh asparagus, and the supermarket offerings are tawdry substitutes.

Asparagus comes first, followed closely by strawberries. A fresh-picked strawberry is a joy and a delight. Lance has a strawberry bed, but his come in a little later than some of the sellers at Farmers' Market, so I bought a box one week and savored them over the course of a couple of days.

Then Lance's berries began to ripen. I awaited eagerly to eat them, savor them, enjoy them. They make the monstrosities purchased from the grocery store taste like only the red-tinted idea of a strawberry. These are Strawberries, pure spring delight that cannot be replicated.

I used to be ambivalent about strawberries: if offered, I would smile and take one, but I didn't go nuts for them. Then I started eat strawberries that were picked when they were ripe (instead of slightly before and then shipped hundreds of miles), and I discovered a whole new world of taste. Now I greedily hoard them, like a dragon protecting rubies, sharing only with those who are worthy.

This morning, I brought strawberries to work for a snack. As I bit into one, it completely captured my attention. It was delightful.

I wish everyone could have the opportunity to experience food in this way. Eating can be a source of pleasure in addition to fueling the body, and understanding that will make more people pursue good quality, fresh, and local food instead of accepting the flavors of things that barely pass as fruits and vegetables. Everyone should have access to this kind of food, not just those with the skills and resources to grow it themselves, nor the individuals who can afford to shop at Whole Foods or other stores that offer it at a premium.

Strawberries should also only be available part of the year, and I don't buy strawberries unless they are in season, and I very rarely by them from the supermarket even when they are in season. They are a visceral pleasure of spring, along with asparagus, that I only enjoy in its proper time. Perhaps that's why the moment of that first bite of asparagus or the first strawberry from the garden is such a delight: I only get to enjoy it for a brief window each year until the next time spring comes around.

Lessons Learned on the Run

2010-05-23T15:03:00.001-05:00

In two weeks, I will be once again ~~subjecting myself to torture~~ participating in a half marathon. Two weeks from yesterday, in fact. So today is my final long run for the training cycle, a lovely 12 miles. The last time I did a 12 miler, it was just before Hogeye in April, so the weather was much nicer. And I got up early. It was a great run.

This, however, is not the story of a wonderful training run, but rather a story of a grueling and rough run. There was no blood, but there were blisters and upset stomachs, and a pee break at Wal-Mart. And lots of walking a smidgen of depression/despair.

See this foot? Isn't it lovely? I like my feet. They are good feet, and get me to where I'd like to go reasonably well and with little fuss. They may be an awkward size to find cute shoes (seriously, what's up with that guys? A size 9 is not ginormous, yet we get shafted on the selection of shoes at Payless). Today, that foot has two blisters, thanks to running--one on my little toe, and one on the other side of my foot, on the pad. Ouch.

So: normally, I try to run early. However, this morning since I'm hanging out alone, I took my time getting up and ready and eating breakfast and drinking coffee and petting the kitties and doing dishes--basically, just putting it off a little longer because a twelve mile run is not something one just undertakes without proper mental preparation.

Since it was going to be hot and I wanted ID/phone with me, I used my little CamelBak for the first time--I bought it specifically for long runs in the summer, because I don't like dehydration. And it was the high point of my run--I could just take a little sip without fuss. And the sloshing only annoyed me a little, and it certainly announced my presence to unsuspecting, slower trail-users.

Everything was going okay for the first 6 miles: my legs were tired from a 40 minute run the day before and a workout class on Friday, but usually I can get past the soreness. About mile 4, I realized I had to pee, so I did what any smart woman would do: locate the nearest facility in which to use their bathroom, since I'm not a fan of urinating in the outdoors (unless I absolutely have to). Luckily, the trail runs right past Wal-Mart, so at mile 6, I ducked in to use their restroom.

Then I noticed a hot spot on the side of my foot, on the pad. Uh oh. I think I know what that is: blister. It did not feel pleasant, though it wasn't excruciating. It was my first running-induced blister, a distance running milestone I had avoided thus far. (Along with black toenails, or completely loss of a toenail. Why the hell do I like to run again??)

After mile 6, I started alternating running and walking because my legs were dead, my body had no energy (I was getting really hungry), and my foot was feeling very uncomfortable. I ate my gel, which usually gives me a wonderful boost of energy. I felt slightly more energetic, but really, I wanted some real food.

I ended up walk/running until about mile 10.5. Then I just quit. I briefly contemplated using my phone to get a ride the rest of the way home, but I sucked it up and walked. (Repeating: there is no shame in walking, there is no shame in walking...) I had a smoothie when I got home, but it just upset my stomach.

Now I'm really sore. And I think my blisters popped already. Thank God tomorrow is recovery day.

So what'd I learn? Eating 45 minutes beforehand is a great idea, because 2 hours later that energy has already been directed elsewhere, so I should have eaten a little snack. Also, running earlier is better because the sun is lower and it's not so damned hot. Also, we had cloud cover for most of the morning from when I intended to run (7 or 8), which was gone by the time I was half done. I'm glad I stopped for a bathroom break, though, because I didn't have to suffer through that on the last 6 miles as well as being in agony from sore muscles. And I love my CamelBak, sloshing and all.

All I hope is that this isn't a sign for how Hospital Hill is going to go.

Things I Did Today

2010-05-22T23:49:00.001-05:00

Very occasionally, I have the house to myself. I usually use this as a time to explore on my own, or mostly to clean and relax without worrying about more dirty socks appearing.

Beginning at 5am, I got up and went out to Devil's Den to hike to a lookout point to see the sunrise with a friend who will soon be embarking on a new adventure. I think it was totally worth only getting a few hours of sleep...

Then we came back to town and went to the farmer's market, where I purchased asparagus, eggs, and new potatoes, and a lovely bouquet of flowers. While waiting for the yarn store to open, we drank coffee and had some breakfast at one of my favorite downtown haunts. Then we went over to the yarn store so that I could pick up a skein of yarn to finish another two-toned shrug (from Fitted Knits--love. this. pattern.)

Back to home, where I lazed around, watching Bones, cleaning, and sitting on the couch, knitting. Then I went to get Sassy, whom I was dog-sitting:

Such a sweet dog. She's easy to watch, and she even ignores the cats.

Then I lazed around some more, went for a walk with the dog, went for a 40-minute run, picked gobs of strawberries, and watched more Bones while eating dinner. I made a beet-yogurt soup, which I shall have to share because it was pretty tasty, and I sauteed onions, new potatoes, carrots, and a huge mound of chard from the garden. Delicious.

I like these occasions to just do what I want. As much as I love hanging out with Lance and spending time with him, it's nice every now and then to just have a day to myself. It recharges and replenishes us both, and keeps life from getting too dull.

Lunchtime Yoga

2010-05-21T14:17:00.000-05:00

In the summer, the pace of the office slows down for a few weeks. Students lazily trickle in and out, staff members and faculty are often absent, and everybody just relaxes for a while. (Then orientation starts, which is fast and furious for a month, then calms back down again).

The HPER offers a few classes at lunchtime, so I wanted to take advantage of the relaxed atmosphere to escape for a class. Today, the schedule showed "Core Yoga" taught by Tracy, described as "A mix of practical pilates and yoga. Starting with breath work, stretching, pilates, sun salutations, arm balances, and inversions." Okay, that doesn't sound so bad. Also, I keep hearing how a strong core makes one a better runner, so core strengthening is always a good thing.

I quickly changed and walked quickly down to the gym. The sun was out, so it was a lovely walk. The class had maybe eight to ten people, so it was nice and small. We grabbed mats and waited for the instructor to arrive, who came breezing in, loud and full of energy. I tried to keep an open mind and not make any judgments until the class started, but I was afraid she'd be a bit obnoxious.

I was wrong, luckily. She was loud, but only at moments where a little extra energy was helpful. When a pose got more difficult, her energetic cries to keep going made me laugh a little, distracting me from how hard I was working. The class was a good environment and not at all intimidating for novices--the instructor made sure to tell us to "listen to our bodies."

My only complaint is that she didn't give a lot of modifications--I knew a few because I've done enough yoga to know, but there was one student who was having a hard time and could have benefited from modifications or direct assistance. The instructor didn't really walk around and help anyone who was struggling, which I'm not really used to, especially in a small class. The class was also fast-paced, so she may not have felt there was enough time to assist anyone directly.

The class flew by quickly, and I felt that I got a good arm and abs workout as well as a stretch. In fact, I felt stretched enough that I wanted to go run because running after yoga always feels really good. It was definitely more of a pilates/strength training class that it was a purely yoga class--we didn't hold the poses as long as I'd like to really relax and stretch out the muscles--but I still liked it. I may have to try it again!

I'll leave you with a picture of the birthday treat I brought for my co-worker, which enjoyed after lunch:

Berry shortcake! The cream was freshly whipped in the office (though whipping was a bitch after all the arm work I did shortly beforehand--feel the shoulder BURN). We picked the wild blackberries from southern Arkansas, and the strawberries were from Lance's garden. Delicious!

Ten Years Later

2010-05-20T10:17:00.000-05:00

Ten years ago, I was standing before a crowd of 17 and 18 year olds, giving a painfully brief valedictorian address. Because I was so shy, I had a hard time coming up with something interesting to say and I probably just read it hurriedly, saying nothing of note or interest. I barely remember what I said, only that it was short. I was proud to be up there, proud to have the honor, but I had no idea about how to give a good speech. I still think about it with a twinge of regret, and will likely avoid watching the video of it, if asked.

That failed speech, however, taught me a lot. I still get nervous speaking in front of people, but I'm getting better about delivery and actually saying something interesting. Thanks to a great freshman year speech class, the constant requirement to speak in front of large groups, and my desire to be a professor, I've worked on it. I've also become a lot less shy, which helps enormously.

Ten years ago, I was a high school graduate, naive and scared of the big, wide world. Now I'm beginning a Ph.D. program in the fall and setting my sights on scholarship, research, and teaching. It's exciting, this life of mine, if only to me.

I feel like such a different person now, but the reality is that I'm still that teenaged girl, just grown up and with more life experiences. I'm different because of my experiences: college, travel, friendships and relationships. Each taught me something new and helped me learn more about myself and how to navigate this not-so-scary world. I used to be terrified of the unknown, but now I embrace it and acknowledge that it's still a little scary. But part of the fun is the twinge of anxiety when facing something new. I've learned to see the world differently, and that's why I feel so different now, ten years after leaving high school.

When we were at Lance's parents' church last weekend, the service was dedicated to the high school (and college) graduates. One guy said something about how high school was the best time of his life. I have to disagree: high school was okay. I didn't hate it, and I have some good memories. It wasn't bad, but I don't think I'd ever go back (even to redo my valedictorian speech). I feel like my life is getting better every single day: I'm in love with a wonderful man, I have purpose and goals to work toward, I have great friends and family, and am surrounded by people I love and who love me. I have cats who like to snuggle with me in the morning. I am satisfied with my life and know that more good experiences await me. Right now is the best time of my life, and if you talk to me in ten years, I hope that I say that that moment is the best.

A Fit Challenge

2010-05-19T09:13:00.000-05:00

You all know that I run. And run. And run some more. I run because I like how it makes me feel, and I like the challenge, and I like how fast I'm getting and how far I can run. I also run because I want to be in better shape. If you talk to any running or fitness professional, however, they will advise that a runner cross-train and do a variety of activities.

I'm really bad at cross-training. Well, not bad, just negligent. I can stick to my running schedule like nobody's business, and I'll do a bit of yoga on a regular basis, but I'm not so good about regularly strength training or doing other forms of cardio.

So to challenge my running self (and, in the end, improve my running), I've decided to take on a challenge. The university gym has several fitness classes throughout the week that I'd like to try out. Usually, I circle the classes I think are interesting, try one or two, then neglect to go to any others. This summer, I want to challenge myself to try out most or all of the classes I can fit into my schedule and attend the ones I like regularly.

THE RULES:

Must attend at least one new class per week.
Must continue with current running schedule (I'm still training for a half-marathon, and I have to keep running!)
Must not go overboard so that Lance forgets my face or starts accusing me of obsessive behaviors. Also, must still make social time with friends.
If I don't enjoy a class, I will not return to it, but I can't dismiss something I haven't tried.
Must blog about each new experience.

That's probably enough rules.

Monday, I attended Strength and Flow taught by Meaghan. The class advertises itself as a yoga/pilates hybrid. I like yoga, and if I have to strength train, I tend to prefer exercises that don't require gobs of equipment, so I decided to give it a try. It wasn't yoga in the sense that I like to think about it--the instructor merely incorporated yoga poses after particularly intense exercises or as a strength exercise. The moves were pretty straightforward, and the only difficulty I had in following everything was when I couldn't see the instructor because I was hiding toward the back.

Overall, I enjoyed the class--it went by quickly, I felt like I got a good workout, and I liked the minimal use of props (we used a balance ball for a few of the exercises). The class was also fairly small as many people went to the Beach Body class taught at the same time (a class I will likely attend next week).

I prefer smaller classes because I don't want to feel like a dork in front of a crowd of people, but I will have to get over that if I wish to complete my little challenge.

What do I want to get out of it? I hope to be fitter and stronger (my upper body strength in particular is laughable, as I can't even do a real push-up), and I hope to become a better runner. My run yesterday actually rocked, and I attribute it to the cross-training I did Monday. So far, a success!

A Wedding Outfit

2010-05-11T11:13:00.000-05:00

There's a parable in the Bible about wedding clothes: I don't quite remember how it goes*, but one of the main ideas is that you don't show up to weddings in old, nasty clothes--you go to a wedding wearing appropriate wedding garments.

I have always felt that one should show up at weddings in a Very Nice Outfit, especially when it's two of my good friends getting married and even more when I've been asked to be involved by making and standing by the guest book, as well as invited to the family/wedding party-only events. So, I decided to make my Very Nice Outfit on my own.

A couple of months ago, I had purchased a beautiful orange and white silk twill because, well, it was beautiful and silky. I had vague notions of a dress. After searching through my patterns, I found a fun strapless dress, so I decided to tackle it, even though I was less than confident in my sewing skills.

The dress had boning, which was scary at first, but turned out to be fairly straightforward. And I had to rip pieces out of the bodice a couple of times because I sewed them in the wrong way. There was a moment of panic when I thought the bodice might be too snug on my waist. But then it all came together and looked pretty good.

It's not perfect: a lacked a zipper foot, so the zipper is less than well placed. I messed up a few other things, but overall, the dress was fun, and it was mine. And the shrug I knit to go with it was quick to make, fun, and went really well with the dress, especially given that it was a little chilly at times during the wedding.

I think that this will not be my final attempt at homemade dresses. I definitely learned a lot from making it, and I look forward to trying my hand out on some other items soon.

*I could look it up, but I am lazy this morning.

Chickpea Pancake Pizza

2010-04-18T21:49:00.001-05:00

Tonight for potluck, I decided to make a pizza out of the chickpea
pancake recipe that I posted the other day.

The potluck theme was curry, so I created a quick pizza sauce by first sauteing onion and garlic in olive oil, then adding diced fresh tomatoes, curry powder, nutritional yeast, garam masala, and salt/ pepper.

After the "crust" had cooked, I added chopped greens (chard, mostly), crumbled tempeh, sliced yellow bell peppers, and enough cheese to hold it all together. It disappeared quickly at potluck, so I think it's a success!

The chickpea pancake/crust is very eggy in texture, so I think my next experiment will be to make a breakfast pizza. NOM.

CAKE VS. PIE

2010-04-16T21:50:00.002-05:00

Cake:

Pie:

For Easter, I decided to stage a CAKE vs. PIE battle. Except that there would be no losers in this epic fight because, really, what could possibly go wrong?

The cake: a triple layer carrot cake with cream cheese frosting. The cake (a recipe from The Buttercup Bakeshop Book) was full of carrots, apples, pecans, spices. To give the pie a fighting chance, I lightened up the recipe a bit by substituting applesauce for some of the butter (since it called for, oh, a whole cup AND A HALF--three sticks--of butter) and using flaxseed/water instead of two of the eggs. However, slathering it with a rich cream cheese frosting didn't hurt anything.

The pie: a lemon crostata, courtesy of Gourmet (now defunct!), via my Epicurious iPhone app. I used this pie as an excuse to try cooking with my iPhone, which actually worked out pretty well. The pie was a good contender: the crust was made of toasted almonds and lemon zest, filled with a silken lemon curd. The crust was more like a shortbread, and the lemon really sang. And I'm a sucker for lemon. (Even though I'm biased toward cake, I had to make it a fair competition!)

The two opponents faced off over the Easter table. The pie looked humble with its overly-darkened crust, while the cake stood tall and proud with its festive frosting carrots and coconut sprinkled sides. Cake won for presentation.

It also won for ease of preparation, because even though the carrot cake was a fancy layer cake with colored frosting, the crust for the crostata was way too fancy and fussy. And I had to blind bake the crust, make the curd separately, then bake the whole thing again. The crust got too dark due to the double-bake. But--it was still lemony and almondy and really freakin' tasty.

The battle began when everyone had to choose their dessert. Lance's mom unequivocally voted in favor of pie: she is a pie person and cannot resist lemon/almond flavored pastries. Lance went for pie, but ate some of my cake, and I got cake. Because I'm a cake girl. Several people got both and insisted that they could not decide. One was not dissuaded from cake, even though there was coconut and he hates coconut. But he liked the cake.

In the end, I asked everyone to pick, and most claimed they could not decide. The two were so different, they cried, that how could they possibly choose? And really--why should there be a battle when two such lovely desserts could exist happily side-by-side?

Carrot Cake with Cream Cheese Frosting
(makes 3 9-inch layers or two loaves)
adapted from The Buttercup Bakeshop Book

This is possibly the best carrot cake recipe I've ever had. You could feasibly make it slightly healthier by substituting up to half the flour with whole wheat pastry flour. It is a delicate cake, so be careful with the layers.

Cake:

2.5 cups flour
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp ginger (or more, if you love ginger like me)
1/2 tsp all spice
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce
1 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 cup granulated sugar
1 large egg, at room temperature
2 tbsp ground flaxseed mixed with 4 tbsp warm water (or just use three eggs total)
2 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 cup apple juice
1.5 cups grated carrots (3-4 medium)
1 apple, grated
1 cup finely chopped pecans
3 tbsp heavy cream, half and half, or even whole milk

Frosting:

2 blocks cream cheese, room temperature
1 stick butter, room temperature
1 tsp vanilla extract
5 cups powdered sugar

For cake: preheat oven to 350. Grease pans and line the bottoms with parchment paper. Butter/spray parchment (optional, but very helpful in the removal of cakes from pans). Set aside

In a medium bowl, whisk flour, baking powder and soda, salt, and spices. In the bowl of your mixer, cream the butter and sugar until fluffy, about 3 minutes. Beat in the apple sauce, then the eggs/egg substitute. Add the vanilla. Add the dry ingredients in thirds, alternating with the apple juice, beginning and ending with the dry. Stir in the apple, carrots, pecan, and cream until everything is well incorporated. Do not overmix.

Divide the batter and bake for 30-35 minutes, until a cake tester comes out clean. Let cakes cool in pans for ten minutes then remove (CAREFULLY) from pans and let cool completely.

Meanwhile, make frosting: beat cream cheese and butter until creamy and fluffy. Add vanilla. Beat in powdered sugar a little at a time until frosting is desired consistency/sweetness. If colored decorations are desired, set aside a bit for dyeing.

After cakes are completely cool, frost. Place one layer on a plate, layer frosting, then add the next layer, more frosting, then the final layer. Frost with a light crumb coat, let sit in the freezer for a few minutes, the frost with the top coat. Decorate with colored frosting, chopped toasted pecans, or dyed/toasted/plain coconut.

PS: Here is why CAKE WILL ALWAYS WIN

(same carrot cake, just decorated with Peeps!! Also, it's a tiny cake!)

Savory Pancakes

2010-04-15T09:14:00.011-05:00

I love pancakes. I am, in fact, plotting a Pancake Fest, in which I will whip out several varieties of pancakes and feed lots of people. (Booze, waffles, and breakfast meats will also be available). Pancakes, however, are something that I can't eat daily for breakfast. Something about all the sugar or something--basically, I end up hungry two hours later.

Lately my breakfast routine has been a bit rushed or dull. I eat some fruit, and then I get a muffin from the coffee shop. Not exactly healthy, so I obviously needed to shake up my breakfast choices. I read somewhere that eating more protein keeps you fuller longer. Since I'm a vegetarian, I can't really eat any meat, and while I like eggs, I usually want something else with them and too much animal fat (eggs, butter, etc) upsets my stomach. (Yes, I'm picky)

Then I remembered The Hungry Tiger had posted about breakfast lentils. Interesting! I was lacking in many of her ingredients, but I liked the idea of something involving legumes and vegetables for breakfast. I grabbed out my How to Cook Everything Vegetarian to see what Mark Bittman had to say about breakfast lentils. Which was nothing. However, he did have a recipe for lentil pancakes.

I didn't want to soak my lentils overnight, so I decided to use his recipe as more inspiration. I'm pretty happy with what came out--it turns out that savory pancakes are almost as good as the traditional ones.

First, I cooked lentils and brown rice until they were done. I had some leftover tomatoes from the shakshuka from dinner the night before, so I added a few scoops of that to the lentils/rice. Then I added some spices, onion, green onion, mushrooms, celery, and garlic and pureed it in the food processor. It needed a bit more texture, so I added some oats, oat flour, and one egg.

Using my cupcake scoop, I scooped out portions and cooked them on the griddle until brown and toasty on each side. I tried one, and they were delicious and, I imagine, infinitely customizable. We tried one with salsa. I imagine they'd even be good with a poached egg on top, if you're into that kind of thing.

Breakfast food experiment, success!

I also made this chickpea pancake (or socca) from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian for dinner. It was kinda odd, but tasty--eggy, even though it didn't have any eggs. It was also amazingly simple and contained relatively few ingredients. I imagine it'd make a great base for a pizza-like dish. Seriously, this book will never get old. If you don't own, I highly recommend it.

Lentil Pancakes
Makes 10-12

This is a VERY rough recipe. Feel free to make substitutions like mad, depending on what you're in the mood for. I'm sure you can skip the egg if you're after a vegan dish. (I really should measure stuff when I experiment in the kitchen, especially when it's delicious.)

2/3 cup uncooked lentils
1/2 cup uncooked brown rice
diced canned tomatoes (~1/3 cup or so)
onion and garlic, to taste
celery
nutritional yeast
mushrooms
spices, such as cumin, curry powder, chili powder, cayenne, salt and pepper, to taste
~1/2 cup rolled oats
~1/2 cup oat flour (to thicken)
1 egg

Cook the lentils. When the water begins to boil, add the brown rice (I just tossed in a handful). Cook until lentils/rice are done. Drain off excess liquid, if any. Add the tomatoes. Let mixture cool to room temperature, then puree in a food processor with onion, garlic, and celery (I'm sure some carrots would be good--I tossed in some chopped mushrooms). Add oats, flour, and egg, and puree. Add salt/pepper and spices to taste. Scoop out and cook on a griddle like a pancake and eat with whatever you think will taste good. I suspect ketchup, chopped tomatoes, a poached egg, greens, a mixture of the above, or anything else would go well.

Chickpea Pancake (Socca or Farinata)
Adapted from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian

Feel free to substitute other flavors for the onion and rosemary. The original called for regular onion, but I used that in my lentil pancakes. It makes a pancake that is eggy in texture and would be a good pizza-like base--simply cook, then add toppings and finish baking, instead of broiling.

1 cup chickpea flour (also known as gram or besan flour)
1 teaspoon salt
ground black pepper, to taste
olive oil
green onion, whites and greens, sliced
fresh rosemary leaves

Put 1.5 cups warm water in a bowl and sift the chickpea flour into the water (else it'll be super lumpy).Add the salt, pepper, and 2 tbsp of olive oil together. Cover with a towel and let stand for a few minutes or overnight.

Preheat the oven to 450. Put ~2 tbsp olive oil into a cast iron skillet (oh, skillet!) and heat on the stove top until the oil and pan are hot (just like making cornbread, if you're a good Southerner). Stir in the onion and rosemary (or whatever) and pour the batter into the hot skillet. Put in the oven and bake for about 15 minutes until the pancake is firm and the edges are set.

Preheat the broiler. Brush the top of the pancake with a bit more oil (which I forgot, and it totally turned out okay) and broil for a minute or two, or until brown spots appear. Cut it up and eat it with salsa or whatever you want!

13.1 Miles

2010-04-14T21:14:00.000-05:00

On Sunday, April 11th, after about 4 hours of sleep, I crawled out of bed. My stomach was jumping and I felt nauseated and nervous. I choked down a bit of toast and peanut butter (before Lance ate it all) and drank some sparkling water. Then Lance and I headed down to the square because the big day had finally arrived: the day of my first half-marathon.

Since December, I have been training for this day. I have logged roughly 300 miles since the start of the year. I may have not always run happily or even as much as I could have, but I ran consistently, and it showed.

I honestly had no idea what to expect, so I simply planned to run it in under 2:15. I didn't really even look up to see what my mile splits would be. When I arrived, however, I discovered that Fleet Feet had pacers, and that one of my running buddies was the 2 hour pacer. He asked, "Do you want to run with me?" and I said "Sure," thinking I would slow down if the pace was too intense.

At first, it was, but I kept J and his balloons in my sight until my legs adjusted to the faster pace, and I caught up. I held that pace for about 9 miles or so, or until I hit the hills (if you look at the graph, you see that it begins and ends with some mean hills). Then I hit a really ugly hill, and I had to walk. (But then again, so did most people).

I rounded the corner on the last mile to be greeted with cheers and offers of a beer, not to mention pirates. Fleet Feet was manning the first/last water stop, and they were amazing and so encouraging. From that point on, I had a giant grin on my face. Even though I had woken feeling poorly, even though I got a crappy nights' sleep, even though this was my first half and I had no idea of what to expect, I knew I was going to finish and finish extremely well.

I crossed the line at 2:02:47, way under my initial goal of 2:05 and my revised goal of 2:15. I was ecstatic. Lance had cheered me on at the very end, and they announced my name as I crossed the finish line, and someone handed me a neat finishers medal. I did it!

And now I'm completely hooked.

Too Cool For School

2010-04-09T10:00:00.001-05:00

In Act III of Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, the first song has three groupies singing about Captain Hammer's dry cleaning bill, "Four sweater vests!"

I do not possess four sweater vests. I like sweater vests, however. So I made myself one (Ravelry link).

(Oh yeah, and I cut all my hair off.)

This is the Back-to-School U-Neck Vest (Ravelry link) from the book Fitted Knits. This book has so many cute projects, and the speed and ease with which I completed this project means I may pick out a few more to do from the book. In fact, I finished it in three weeks, and I feel like I could have finished it in a few days if I had focused on it. It's knit with Cascade Lana D'Oro, a soft alpaca-wool blend that I love.

Though I'm not in school (yet! Though I am accepted at UA...) anymore, this vest is perfect for work. It's soft and comfortable, and I want three more in different colors, so that someone can sing about my four sweater vests, if I ever gain any groupies.

Super Special Birthday Cake

2010-03-21T14:36:00.005-05:00

Today is Lance's grandma's birthday. We were supposed to go up and take her to church and have lunch on her, but then we got a foot of snow:

Crazy. Anyway, with all the snow, we postponed special meal until (probably) tomorrow, though I have to fit my 12 mile long run in there somewhere. She requested a chocolate/coffee flavor combination, which gave me lots of options. I've made this espresso chiffon layer cake before, but I wanted something different. Fancier.

So I pulled out my awesome baking book, In the Sweet Kitchen by Regan Daley (a great resource for bakers, FYI) and found a recipe for a walnut layer cake (note to self: make this cake later) with espresso buttercream. Not a chocolate cake, so it didn't qualify, but I liked the idea of the frosting. So I consulted another cookbook and found a recipe for an intense chocolate cake. I decided to bake that cake with the espresso buttercream and decorate it with melted chocolate and chocolate-covered espresso beans. It turned out extremely well, and the buttercream is amazing--not a "quick buttercream," (which is just butter and powdered sugar and is usually way too sweet for my tastes) but instead one that involves meringue and obscene amounts of butter.

The beautiful, lovely buttercream:

Spreading the beautiful buttercream on a layer:

The layers all stacked up:

The finished cake:

The cake was lovely (I tasted the bits I cut off to somewhat level the layers), the buttercream is not too sweet and is also lovely (I may never make a quick buttercream again), and the cake looks beautiful and special. And as soon as the roads are clear, we'll be heading up to share it with her!

And in case you want the recipe, here it is!

Super Special Chocolate Cake with Espresso Buttercream

Chocolate Cake (from The Buttercup Bake Shop Cookbook):

1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
3/4 cup freshly brewed coffee, cooled
1/2 cup cold water
2 tsp vanilla extract
2-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1-1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
3/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
1-1/2 cup sugar
3 large eggs, room temperature
6 oz unsweetened chocolate, melted and cooled to room temperature

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease and lightly flour 3 cake pans. Line the bottoms with circles of parchment paper and lightly grease the papers (can skip this step, but it helps to get the layers out of the pan)

In a small bowl, whisk together cocoa, coffee, water, and vanilla. In a medium bowl, mix the flour, baking soda and salt. Set both bowls aside.

Cream the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy, a few minutes. Beat in the eggs one a time, then beat in the melted chocolate. Alternate adding the flour mixture and the liquid mixture, beginning and ending with the flour, in three additions. Do not over mix.

Divide the batter among the three pans and bake 20-25 minutes, until cakes are done. Let cool in the pans for 10 minutes, the remove from pans at let cool completely on the wire rack.

Espresso Syrup (adapted from Smitten Kitchen):

1/3 cup freshly brewed espresso or strong coffee
1/3 cup brandy or rum
1/3 cup sugar

Mix all together until the sugar dissolves (I had to heat mine slightly).

Espresso Buttercream (adapted from In the Sweet Kitchen):
NB: good quality butter and eggs are a must, since they'll really add to the flavor of the buttercream.

4 large egg whites (be careful not to allow any yolk or fat to drop in)
1 cup sugar
1-1/4 cups unsalted butter, at room temperature
1 tsp vanilla
2-1/2 tbsp instant espresso powder dissolved in 1-1/2 tbsp hot water, cooled

In a pot, bring an inch or so of water to a simmer. Lightly beat the egg whites, the add the sugar and whisk until frothy. Set the bowl over the water and whisk until the sugar dissolves and the mixture is very warm (but not hot), about five minutes. Transfer to a clean bowl and whip the egg whites until it is cool to touch, about 8-10 minutes. If it's not cool enough, the heat will melt the butter and give you issues, so don't be afraid to beat it. The meringue will be stiff and glossy.

Beat in the butter, a little at a time, making sure it is completely incorporated before adding more. Don't be afraid to beat it and make sure to scrape the sides of the bowl. Once all the butter is incorporated, add the vanilla, then add the espresso mixture a little at a time, beating well.

The frosting should be glossy and smooth. If it's not (and it wasn't for me) or if it starts to separate or look funny, put the bowl over some hot tap water and whisk it until it gets smooth. It smoothed out beautifully for me (as you can see from the pictures).

To assemble the cake:

Brush extra crumbs off the layers, and level them off. Brush the top of the cake with some of the syrup (I didn't use all of it--it is optional and helps to keep the cake moist.)
Put a dollop of buttercream between the layers. Brush off crumbs.
Frost the cake (Smitten Kitchen has some good tips--I like putting the crumb coat on, chilling briefly in the freezer, then applying the top coat.)
Melt 2 oz. dark chocolate and use a fine tip on a pastry bag to make the criss-cross. Put a dab in the center of the diamonds and place a chocolate-covered espresso bean on the chocolate dots.

A perfect cake to share with a loved one for a special day.

The First Day of Spring

2010-03-21T10:11:00.004-05:00

Last Night:

This morning:

And it's still snowing!

Bag Lady

2010-03-18T19:35:00.002-05:00

I made a bag:

It's the French Market Bag, and it was my first felted project. Also my first use of the Kitchener Stitch, which was surprisingly fun.

I started this bag a few years ago, and when I decided to start working on projects that were languishing in my project bags, I picked this one back up. It's a fairly easy pattern, and I finished it quickly, once I focused on it. I'm pretty pleased with it.

Felting was quick and easy: throw thing to be felted into the washing machine with some towels, hot water, and soap. Let agitate until desired level of felt. Dry. Tada! Felted object.

I use this for my lunch sack currently because wool is awesome and this keeps my food pretty cold if I decide to leave it out. It's also handy for toting things generally.

Stay tuned for another FO: a sweater vest!

Dinner Quandries

2010-03-17T14:46:00.003-05:00

You all know that I love to cook. Lance and I both are passionate and adamant about cooking and eating good food, shopping at the local market and natural foods co-op*. We prepare most of our own meals and love nothing more than to share our creations with others.

Lately, there's been a discussion going on in Google Reader on shared items involving food, food choices, food regulation, and how socioeconomic status plays into it all. Of course, I was vaguely aware that my ability to purchase fresh, organic produce or to buy from the Farmers' Market on a regular basis was a privilege. I don't make tons of money, but I make enough to afford good quality food, and we make it a priority to spend a bit more on it (instead of, say, paying for cable or eating out a lot).

I'm lucky to be able to have both the financial means to purchase organic produce and to have access to it. I realized, however, that not everyone lives where they can easily buy organic goods or can even afford them if they did have access. When I was growing up, my parents couldn't afford to purchase enough fresh fruits and vegetables to feed all seven individuals all the time (two adults and five children), and so we ate lots of spaghetti, ground beef or turkey, cheap lunch meat, white bread, peanut butter and jelly, and macaroni and cheese. We had canned or frozen vegetables mixed in (but not always), and I don't think we ever had a big green salad with our meals (which I eat almost daily now). We generally had bananas, and sometimes oranges or apples, but not always. I used to hate fresh green beans because I only ate the canned ones. We had our free school lunches, but as this blog points out, school lunches aren't exactly the paragon of good nutrition. We had plenty of food growing up, but now when I go to my parents' house, I have to bring my own food or I'll have a bad case of indigestion from the food I grew up eating. (Not to mention that they don't exactly good vegetarian-friendly dishes, so I just cook for myself and share with them, if they like).

People who are poor and live away from a good grocery store where they can buy anything fresh (let alone organic) don't have the same level of access that I now have to good quality food. They have to rely on the cheap, processed products they can afford and have access to for nutrition. Those in higher socioeconomic groups ignore the base problem of access, and insist that poor people are ignorant of their health and just need to be better educated**.

Another problem is that the government subsidizes the foods that have been shown to lead to obesity, diabetes, and cancer. If the government would switch to subsidizing salads and ensuring better food access for poor people, then maybe they would be able to afford to eat better and make better food choices.

Food and politics and morality are all tangled up in very wrong ways in America. Eating isn't a simple act. I'm fortunate to be able to be picky and shun processed foods, but not everyone has that choice. Sometimes all my parents could afford to buy us for dinner was a 25 cent box of macaroni and cheese and a package of hot dogs. They were sharply aware that it wasn't very healthy, but they didn't have a choice.

*We do, of course, occasionally eat something that might not fall into this category, like fried potato wedges on a road trip. But we try to mostly eat the good stuff, since too much junk/fast food makes us feel like crap.
**I do think that some education needs to happen, but poor people are not the only ones who are ignorant--middle-class children raised on pre-packaged food because the parents are too busy to bother cooking a real meal certainly need to learn that they need to change how they eat to be healthy. And a thin person who eats burgers and won't touch fruit or vegetables falls into that same category.

A Miscellany of Items

2010-03-16T13:44:00.003-05:00

I really need to just do my taxes. It's ridiculous that I keep putting it off, especially when the government will give me some money when I'm done.
I had a weird sense of satisfaction in listing my and Lance's relationship as "unmarried partnership" on the census form.
I didn't get into University of Illinois.
I have three more chances to get into a Ph.D. program (with funding, please).
My race this weekend (a 20k trail race) was cancelled because someone got lost in the woods on the 50 mile race the day before. The runner was eventually found and was all right, I believe.
Our weekend road trip started off ominously with a sick child (we were riding with friends), but it ended quite nicely with flea market shopping, games, and good food and a trip to Serenity Farm Bread (NOM) on the way home.
Cilantro is gross, and Taco Tuesday was nearly ruined by its presence.
Still running lots--I even got a Garmin!--and I signed up for the Hogeye Half-Marathon.
Leaving for the weekend means I have way too many items to catch up on in Google Reader. Might be time to thin the subscriptions down a bit, since I've acquired so many sharebros, and they keep Reader pretty busy.
I have things that I have made and would like to post about...sometime.
Happy birthday shout out to my sister-in-law!

Running Doldrums

2010-03-04T14:47:00.003-06:00

A few weeks ago, I was in the midst of the running doldrums. I was dutifully running, but I wasn't super excited about doing so. I almost (or did) skip some runs, and I even failed to go to a race I signed up for. I couldn't get out of bed for the Sunday early morning group long runs, though I somehow still manged (grudgingly) to get them in later in the day.

I think that the combination of cold, increasing mileage, and lack of sun contributed to this feeling. I have to say that I'm very glad it's gone, since I'm now excited and motivated when it's time to go for a run.

Today, I meant to get up early and go run outside but failed to do so. I really wanted to get that run in today, and since I'm unable to run tonight (which I normally do with the group), I just didn't know when. The weather promised to be lovely, so I grabbed some workout clothes with the thought that maybe I would run at lunch.

And I did. And it was great. I did a 30 minute tempo run, which felt wonderful. The sun was out, the temperature was perfect for running, and the sky was so blue that I couldn't help be feel the pleasure of moving myself outdoors. I walked for a few minutes to cool down, the stretched/sat down on the lawn to finish. I came back to the office refreshed and energized.

I think I'm going to make a habit of going for long walks or short runs when it's nice. It's a great way to move more during the day (since sitting will kill you, even if you work out regularly), and it's a good break from the office. Yay for fantastic weather!

Climbing the WALL

2010-03-02T10:16:00.002-06:00

One year, when I was still an undergrad, I overcame my fear of heights (well, falling, actually) and climbed a rock wall. It was exhilarating, I loved it, and promptly forgot about it.

A few months ago, I visited my brother. He's a big fan of rockclimbing, so he took us to his climbing gym. We climbed for a while, and I really, really liked it. When I returned home, I promised myself that I would use the wall at my gym to climb more often.

Then I forgot about it.

Yesterday, I was at the gym with some time to kill until a fitness assessment. I had forgotten my ID, so by the time I made it back, the class I planned to attend had started. I played a game of racquetball with Lance, but then S. showed up to play with him, so I had to go find something to do for 20 minutes. Then I walked by the rock wall. So I went in and climbed it.

It was so much fun that after my fitness assessment, I went back and climbed some more. I can't explain why I--girl who is terrified of climbing tall ladders and is deeply afraid of falling off of things--really enjoy climbing. It's exhilarating--trying to figure out where to go next, keeping my grip on the rocks, planning my next move. And getting to the top. Even if I miss and "fall", I simply dangle there securely until I either try to grab back on or am lowered down.

I left the wall satisfied and content, knowing that I will be making regular time in the future to climb the wall.

The Difference

2010-03-01T09:09:00.003-06:00

Last year, I tried training for a half-marathon and ended up injured and unable (or afraid) to run for six months. Last year, when I would return from my long runs, I would be exhausted and sleepy. Sometimes I would end up gobbling down whatever I could eat and would either feel nauseated or (occasionally) threw up. My long runs left me wiped for the day.

This year, everything is different.

I'm sure part of the difference is that I've been training consistently since August, whereas last year I was inconsistent and lazy about running. I'm smarter about my runs, more experienced, and in much better shape this time. And I can really feel the difference.

For example, the last two weeks we've had 10 mile runs. Last year after an 8-10 mile run, I felt horrible. Exhausted, nauseated, and I just wanted to sit in the bath tub or take a nap. This year, I feel energized. I come home and eat something non-sugary (part of my problem last time was that I consumed a lot of sugar--now I make sure to eat something with protein and complex carbs), stretch, take a hot shower, and maybe take a nap. I think my sleepiness has more to do with the 6am alarm rather than feeling completely beaten down.

The runs themselves also feel completely different. I feel strong and maintain a good pace. Last year, I was bringing up the back of the pack, this year I'm in the middle-front. That feels nice. My body hurts a little toward the end, but it's a discomfort that fades quickly after resting and stretching.

My motivation is definitely higher. I know that if I don't run consistently, I'll get hurt. So I go run even when I don't want to, which makes me feel great in the end.

I only have six more weeks until the half-marathon, and I'm starting to realize that I'm going to do it this year. And my next challenge? An actual marathon this fall. The rest of the spring and summer will be spent strengthening my body and building up my mileage so that I can tackle marathon training with the same dedication and vigor that I have had for the half-marathon.

Ruffle Slayer

2010-02-15T21:47:00.006-06:00

The ruffles, oh the ruffles! I like a ruffle here and there, but I cannot abide an over abundance of them. And this top that I picked up a couple of years ago was overrun with ruffles:

Now, I found this shirt in a thrift store a while back and tried it on and liked it in spite of the ruffles. It had some great style points, like the buttons to one side and the color. But if I was going to make this shirt part of my wardrobe, those ruffles would have to die.

I got out my handy seam ripper and took out the faux-Shakespearean neck ruffle and the two ruffles that ran from the front to the back, while leaving the comparatively tasteful ruffles around the sleeves. When I pinned it back together, I stopped--it needed more work, but I was too afraid to just jump in and cut into the fabric. What if I messed it up?

After the inspiration of reading New Dress A Day and my weekend thrift adventure, I felt bold enough to tackle this shirt again. So I busted it out of the project bag and finally sewed the seams back up.

What had been stopping me from completely finishing was that I wanted to change the neckline. Once the ruffles were gone, the neck was boring and plain and didn't really fit with the style of the de-ruffled top. So I took a deep breath and cut into the fabric. Then I seamed it up. Then I tried it back on--and I really like how it turned out.

Not a perfect fix, but it helped me see that I have nothing to lose by trying something. I like the asymmetrical neckline with the buttons to one side, and I like that I turned a ruffled monstrosity into a sassy, interesting top. That's what I get for taking a chance!

*Edited to add: I have to think my fellow thrift adventuress, AW, for spurring me to haul this out of the bucket. I think she said something along the lines of "Just finish the darned thing." And that's what good friends are for.

Old Things Made New

2010-02-13T21:27:00.006-06:00

My parents bought a lot of my clothes at thrift stores when I was a kid. Now, I didn't mind that so much (when I found things I liked), but some of the things my mom would buy for me were hideous or just not very trendy. I can vividly recall a pair of pants straight from the early eighties with a floral pattern in blues and greens and pinks. It looked like someone vomited a bouquet, and I refused to wear it, causing my mom to swear she'd never buy me clothes ever again.

When I started making my own money, I stopped going to thrift stores as much, preferring new clothes that were in style and new.

Fast forward a few years, and now I love finding things secondhand. For one thing, they're so cheap! And I can often find good quality clothing for a mere fraction of the price. While I would willingly purchase secondhand clothes if they fit, I never really thought about buying something with the goal of making it into something else.

Last week, a friend sent me a link to the New Dress A Day blog. The author's goal is to create a new outfit out of cheaply ($1 or so) thrifted clothing. Some of the outfits are a little out there for my own style, but I loved her ideas. She is creative and often completely transforms an ugly article into something adorable.

After reading through her backlog of posts, I promptly planned a Great Thrift Excursion with a friend and hit up many of our area thrift stores. I found lots of adorable things (that wouldn't need work) and several pieces that would need a little work, and a few that would need a LOT of work before they would be wearable.

One item was a cute corduroy blazer. While it fit perfectly in length and fit, the sleeves were too short.

The jacket is a petite. Apparently I have a petite upper body except for my long arms. This jacket is no good without a littl help, so that's exactly what I decided to do.

I wear a lot of 3/4 sleeve sweaters, shirts, and little jackets (because of the long arm problem, even "regular" lengths are often a little short on my arms), so I simply lopped off the jacket sleeves to an appropriate 3/4 length, hemmed it up, and tada! new jacket.

It's great what a little creativity and $2 can get you. I also fixed a couple of belts to wear over outfits, but that's pretty boring (I punched new holes or cut off some of the length so they fit me better).

I look forward to showing you some more of my transformations--I certainly have enough projects to keep me busy for a while!

Crossing Over

2010-01-28T10:35:00.002-06:00

I have officially crossed over to being a runner. (Officially because I recognized that I'm a little obsessed with running now).

What led me to this conclusion? When I found myself setting out for a 5 mile run yesterday at 6am even though my brain didn't really want to, running up hills that I'd normally avoid, and being really, really happy about it all, I realized that I'd become a runner.

That is just one sign, however. I've also become part of the running community in my town, running with them two or three days a week. I have different kinds of runs for different days (this morning was a tempo run, which means run faster, yeah!) and I get antsy if I miss one of my runs. I even fell asleep last night thinking about running.

I love being a member of a running group. I have other people to talk about training, events we're looking at, progress, tips and training aids. (Several of them have Garmans, and I think I kinda want one now...) I've also been picking out runners in the group who are a little faster than me and trying to keep up with them so that I can end up running faster.

A few weeks ago, I fell on some stairs, and my first thought was not "Ouch, I fell down," it was "My knees! My running!"

So, yes, I am a runner.

Soup School

2010-01-25T14:20:00.005-06:00

I made another soup this weekend to eat on throughout the week. A big pot of soup easily lasts us the entire week for lunches with a dinner or two thrown in. I don't mind eating the same thing for both lunch and dinner; if I do, I'll vary what I have with it (salad? bread? cooked greens?) so I don't get bored.

I realize that one reason I can just whip out a soup without a recipe is that I use the same "base" recipe for soups and just vary what I put in it, based on what's in my fridge/freezer. Since I figure some of my intrepid readers might like to experiment with making delicious, nutritious, and filling soups of their own (without much fuss!), I thought I'd post a short course on soup making.

I like to start my soups with a mirepoix, which is just a fancy way of saying onion, carrots, and celery. If I don't have celery or carrots, I simply start with onion, but I prefer celery and carrots for my soup base. Finely dice the mirepoix and saute in butter or a splash of olive oil until the vegetables begin to soften and get fragrant.

For those who are meat-eaters or like a little meat flavor in their soup, feel free to add a ham hock or bit of chopped stew meat, a smoked turkey leg (really good with split pea, incidentally), or something like a venison neck bone that is lurking in the depths of your freezer (yes, that would be us). Searing the meat helps release some of the flavors into the soup base.

The liquid part of the soup can be plain water, a bit of flavorful stock (you really should try to make your own occasionally, or at least buy good quality stock free of MSG or preservatives), or a bit of bouillon and water. We have a salt-free vegan vegetable bouillon that is nice to use if we don't have any vegetable stock on hand. (I use a salt-free bouillon because I can add my own salt, and I'm after the vegetable/herb flavor anyway. I'm planning on trying my hand at some homemade bouillon soon.)

Now here's the hard part: what are the main components of your soup? As a (mostly) vegetarian, I obviously want gobs of vegetables and beans. There is nothing wrong with a bit of meat or dairy, of course, for those who want something a bit heartier. I find the best soups showcase the vegetables and use the meat as a flavor rather than primary component. You can use a mixture of fresh vegetables or frozen, whatever you might have on hand.

The soup I made this weekend was a freezer clearing soup: I used frozen squash and a partial package of peas, a lone can of green beans I needed to get rid of, some beans we'd tossed in the freezer a while back, a frozen pepper, frozen leek tops leftover from another recipe, and some frozen celery. I also thawed out a couple of cups of pumpkin puree to add to the liquid, which was a delicious way to add flavor and thicken it a bit. My primary seasonings for this one were an Italian herb mix, parsley, nutritional yeast (which ups the umami quotient without using animal products!), and salt and pepper.

Other ideas would be to add more legumes (like lentils or split peas) for a legume-based soup, or adding more vegetables if you want a mixed vegetable soup. Potatoes, squash (winter or summer), greens, etc. make great soups. You could even roast cubes of vegetables to change the flavor profile. Adding milk, cream, or cheese (or a combination) would make the soup creamier and thicker. Adding a vegetable puree (like potato) would also thicken it up. Adding a bit of rice, oats, bulgar wheat, or any other grain lends a different texture to the soup.

Add your vegetables, legumes, and/or grains to the pot (after the liquid) and let cook until the vegetables are done and everything is tender. You'll want to taste and adjust your seasonings, since salt levels can vary wildly, depending. (And if you accidentally over-salt, just throw in a cubed chunk of potato to simmer until tender! Potatoes absorb salt like crazy.) If you plan to add cheese/dairy, wait until towards the end of the cooking time.

Making a good soup is largely a matter of taste, what you want in a soup, and (at least for me) which ingredients are available. I would just take the soup base and experiment with adding different ingredients and seasonings to see what you can come up with!

Pumpkin minestrone

2010-01-20T15:21:00.004-06:00

As I just learned from Wikipedia, a minestrone is a thick vegetable soup, Italian in origin. So I can officially sorta call the soup that I created the past weekend a minestrone.

It's the season for soup: when I'm craving something warm and healthy and filling (but generally light), I reach for soups. I'm not normally very good at just making up recipes, but soup is one of the things that I do easily by feel. I usually start with a sense of what I'm looking for in a soup, scour my cabinets and freezer/refrigerator to see what ingredients I have, then throw it all together. This soup was one such concoction (with Lance's spicing help).

I wanted to make a pumpkin and bean soup. I had frozen pumpkin cubes and plenty of beans. I almost leaned toward a curried-coconut milk based soup, but veered toward the lighter minestrone feel. It made a huge pot of deliciousness--I just finished off the last bowl with half an avocado chunked into it. With a hunk of crusty bread and/or a salad, this soup makes for a satisfyingly wholesome winter meal.

Sorry about the approximations on the ingredients--I really did just throw things together. The good thing about soups, fortunately, is that there is plenty of wiggle room for ingredients, so feel free to add a vegetable or three (or even some grains or a little meat, if you're into that) or make substitutions like mad! (I thought that it might be especially good with a little chopped chard for some greenery).

Pumpkin Minestrone

olive oil
1 onion, chopped
2 carrots, chopped
2 stalks celery, chopped
3 cloves garlic, minced
1-2 lbs cubed pumpkin or squash
4 cups vegetable stock or water
1 28-oz can crushed tomatoes (I heartily recommend Muir Glen canned tomatoes)
roughly 3 cups (or 1-2 cans) beans (I used baby limas, but I imagine that navy beans would be good. I put in about 1.5-2 cups uncooked lima beans in the pressure cooker and let them cook lightly, finishing them in the soup)
salt, pepper, nutritional yeast, Italian seasonings to taste

In a big pot, heat the olive oil on a medium-high heat. Add the onion, carrot, and celery and saute until the vegetables soften some. Add in the garlic and cook a little more.

Add the pumpkin, stock, tomatoes, beans to the pot and bring to a boil. Turn down the pot to a simmer and let the vegetables cook. Add some salt and pepper and other seasonings to taste.

When the pumpkin begins to lose the corners on the cubes and gets soft, mash up a few of the cubes to thicken the soup (if you so desire--this was Lance's idea), taste and adjust seasonings as needed.

So simple and so good! I think this soup is delicious, and since it makes a lot, you could probably freeze some of it for later or share with several friends.

A Joke

2010-01-11T14:59:00.002-06:00

Q: What does a vegan zombie eat?
A: GRAAAAIINS!!!

(I love cheesy jokes, incidentally. Love them to pieces. Really bad puns are also infinitely amusing. I don't know why, but this one has been making me giggle all weekend, especially as I was eating my bowl of GRAAAIINS!!! this morning.)

Just What I Needed

2010-01-07T20:11:00.004-06:00

Several months ago, I encountered a pair of the loveliest boots when I was browsing for new footwear. I own a pair of black knee high boots, but they aren't always practical and comfortable for walking, so I was on the hunt (like Donna before me) for practical, beautiful boots. Then these Keen Bern High Boots came across my radar:Just...look at them. Don't they look lovely? They were everything I wanted in a new pair of boots: good quality, highly functional, warm, and purportedly comfortable. Lance owns a pair of Keens and raves about how awesome they feel on his feet and how well made they are. When I saw this review of them, my decision was made. I must have these boots.

Oh, but they are expensive. Quality shoes usually are, and these oh-so-durable and comfortable boots were outside my budget. So I sighed longingly and visited various sites that sold them each week, hoping for a sale, but alas, no such luck. I showed them to various people, eliciting opinions on which color I should get (the brown? the black?), finally deciding that I like the reddish brown color the best.

Several months later, I stumbled across them again on REI. On sale!! The stars had aligned. I had just taken the GRE and greatly improved my score, so I talked myself into them as a reward for my hard work (oh, the studying! The application process!)

And I must say they were one of the smartest shoe purchases I've made.

They are soft and comfortable and durable and quality. They fit like a dream. I tramped through snow on Christmas night in them, and my feet were cozy and warm. I've been wearing them all this week as temperatures reach dangerously low temperatures, and they keep my feet happy. They are the perfect mix of style, comfort, and walkability, and they are mine.

The lesson? Delayed gratification is sometimes more satisfying than impulse purchasing, especially when it results in cute and comfy boots.

A Challenge!

2010-01-06T16:35:00.003-06:00

Last October, I joined the Social Workout Eat, Sweat, Blog challenge, which was super fun. It turns out that I'll willingly deprive myself of things if it's a game. I had tons of fun and even got a cool t-shirt out of it. So I joined the Emergency Holiday Challenge, which was also fun (although I didn't complete enough challenges).

Then I saw the New Year's Edition Challenge, which runs from January 11-February 12, and figured it would be a fun way to challenge myself to keep working out regularly and to accomplish daring feats! I think I even convinced my co-worker to sign up too. Feel free to join in the fun, if you wish!

The Challenge requires one to workout 20 times in the 33-day period and to accomplish at least 10 feats of strength. I like to figure out which feats I plan to attempt, and so I shall share them with you here. I selected 15, so that if a few don't work out, I still accomplish what I'm after.

Jan Plan Plus: No booze from January 11th-January 31. Not always the most fun, but definitely a good challenge.
Sugar-Free: One week, no sugar--always a challenge for me! I shall attempt extend this one for the duration of the challenge
Whole-Grainy: no white foods for the duration (white rice, white flour, etc)
Swap Meat: Well, since I'm a vegetarian, I'm going to try to do Vegan Mondays (or a vegan day once a week). Shouldn't be too hard...
Home Food: four meals a week at home? Easy as homemade pie. :)
Sun Salute: sun salutations, every morning--a great way to wake up and tone my arms!
Stand Up: on the hour, every hour, at work. Because sitting kills.
Home Workout: create a workout space and use it once a week. This might be difficult because I can't create a dedicated workout space--I just have to use my office or my living room. For me, the challenge will be utilizing a home workout resource: videos, yoga mat, etc.
Take a bath: ohhh, yeah. This is a good one--since I'll be doing longer and longer Sunday runs, taking a bath afterward will aid in recovery and warm me back up!
Sleep log: keep track of when I go to bed and when I get up...because I really should be sleeping more with the increased running.
Sleep discipline: for seven days in a row, get up and stay up by 6:30am. Yikes!
Worm and Fuzzy: Compost! (Which we already do, so this one's a freebie for me)
Energy Sabbatical: twice during the challenge, shut off all inessential electronics. This will be tough, but Lance thinks it'll be a fun challenge too!
Plant Friendly: possess plants. Um, double check on that one. Another freebie!
DIY Feat: I'm challenging myself to simplify my life. This means working to get rid of useless/excess belongings and other simplifying measures, such as reducing the number of Google Reader subscriptions...

Should be a fun time all around!

Fruits of the Press

2010-01-05T21:56:00.006-06:00

Yesterday, I discussed making tofu. When I posted, I had yet to actually try any of the fruits of our tofu press. Today we had both something made from the leftover soybean pulp (or okara) and the freshly made tofu.

For breakfast, Lance fried up some soysage patties. If you like sausage, you definitely will not be fooled, but these little mock-breakfast meats were pretty satisfying with a fried egg and piece of homemade bread. I like them and will most likely continue to use the okara (soybean pulp) to make a batch every now and then.

Dinner was also soy based, as I wanted to eat the tofu while it was still fresh, since all of the tofu making guides claim it is most delicious when fresh. So I busted out Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything Vegetarian, my go-to guide for cooking, well, everything vegetarian. (A note: if you are looking for a comprehensive guide to vegetarian cooking, buy this book. Seriously.)

I decided to make Braised Tofu and Peas in Curried Coconut Milk, which while it might seem to be something to mask the flavor of freshly made tofu, it in fact proved complimentary. Luckily it made enough for many meals for the next week. Since I love peas, curry, and coconut milk (not to mention tofu), it was a recipe that pleased me. A warning: the recipe calls for quite a lot of tofu. If you are new to tofu or are uncertain if you like the texture of braised tofu, try a bit less, add more vegetables, and see how you like it. You can also freeze and thaw or press and fry the tofu beforehand to firm up the texture.

And yes, the fresh tofu definitely tasted better than the packaged stuff, but if you're new to tofu, definitely don't be intimidated. I like the ease and convenience of the non-homemade tofu as much as anybody and will probably still buy it on occasion because making tofu is sort of a pain, even if it is cheaper and tastier.

Soysage
adapted from Sam's Mom's recipe

4 cups soy pulp
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 cup wheat germ
3/4 cup oil
1 1/4 cup water (original called for soymilk, which I didn't have)
2 cups nutritional yeast
1 1/2 tsp fennel seed
1 tsp black pepper (or more, to taste)
2 tsp sage
1/4 cup soy sauce
3 tsp oregano
2 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp cayenne (or more for spicy soysage)
2 tbsp brown sugar
2 tbsp liquid smoke
3 cloves garlic, minced (or more, if you love garlic), or 2 tbsp garlic powder
1 tbsp rice vinegar
3/4 tbsp mustard powder

Mix ingredients in a large bowl. Put into a loaf pan and steam in a wok or a covered pot on a rack for at least half an hour. Let sit until cool, then scoop out to make patties to fry.

Braised Tofu and Peas in Curried Coconut Milk
adapted from How to Cook Everything Vegetarian

2 large onions, quartered
1 28-oz can tomatoes with their liquid (I prefer the Muir Glen canned tomatoes)
2 tbsp neutral oil
salt and freshly ground black pepper
2-3 tbsp garam masala or curry powder, or a combination--to taste. (I mixed them, and added 3 tbsp)
1/4-1/2 cup nutritional yeast (optional)
red pepper or other heat (we like it spicy in the M-M household)
2 tbsp brown sugar
1 1/2 to 2 lbs (1-2 packages) firm to extra firm tofu, cut into 3/4-in cubes
1 1/2 cups peas (I ended up using two 10-oz pkgs because I LOVE PEAS)
1 can coconut milk plus a little water
Chopped cilantro for garnish (unless cilantro is vile to you like it is to me, then I garnished with some cashews instead)
brown rice (or other grain) for serving (optional)

Place the onion and the tomato in a food processor and puree. Put the oil in a pot and heat, adding the puree. Add salt, pepper, and spices. Cook, stirring occasionally, about 10 minutes.

Add the tofu and peas and cook for another 5 minutes, until the tofu swells slightly and the peas are tender. Stir in the coconut milk and bring back to almost a boil, stirring occasionally (though not too much, or you'll break up the tofu). Taste, adjust seasonings as needed and serve with (or without) garnish.

Homemade Tofu

2010-01-04T16:32:00.005-06:00

I love tofu. I really do. Even before I declared myself a vegetarian, I ate tofu regularly with delight and enthusiasm. I think it's versatile and tasty, when prepared properly.

Because I love tofu so much and because homemade tofu is apparently much better (and cheaper) than store-bought, Lance bought me a tofu making kit. It sat, dusty and forlorn atop my refrigerator for a year, until finally we decided to use our Sunday to use it. I don't know what the heck took us so long.

Using this post as our guide, we dutifully soaked our soybeans, ground them, and pressed them. The first batch didn't turn out as well as expected because we didn't grind the soybeans finely enough--Lance used a hand blender. The recipe was supposed to make one tofu mold full, but we got a thin little brick instead.

Wanting to figure out what was wrong, Lance got another batch of soybeans soaking, and today we tried again with a blender. Our results were MUCH better.

Here's a picture of the mold lined with muslin and the soy curds...

And our high-tech pressing system (a jar of cherries)

After it presses for about five hours, we'll have a nice block of firm tofu! It's all very exciting. I think we may have to invest in a soymilk maker, however, if we want to make it regularly because the most time intensive part of the process is making the soymilk. We're going to make soy sausage from the leftover soybean bits (called okara), so I may post that tomorrow.

Making a Bed

2010-01-03T19:11:00.006-06:00

For Christmas, my dear friend AW bought me One-Yard Wonders, a sewing book with over 100 projects that only require one yard of fabric. I'd been eye-balling the book since she showed me her copy a few weeks before Christmas, but luckily I decided to hold off until I had, you know, more money. Which worked out in my favor--thanks AW!

Anyway, the first project that caught my eye was the "Better than a Box Pet Bed," which looked nice and snuggly. Cats are notorious for shunning beds that are purchased/made especially for them, but my cats LOVE fleeces (or "fuzzy blankets" as they are known in the M/M household). How could they possibly resist a cushy bed made entirely of soft, warm fleece?

Hobby Lobby had a sale on fleece fabric; I had Hobby Lobby Christmas giftcards, and thus the fates aligned for me to make this:

As you can see, the cat does not shun it. She in fact loves it. And since I have two cats, I shall make another one to lay in random places around the house. This way the cats have warm comfortable places to lay when we're not home and they can't snuggle under the covers with us, which is how they've been coping thus far with the cold weather and our reluctance to turn on the heat above 68.

As soon as Rory vacated the bed, Neko jumped right in, so I'm sure the beds will be popular with both kitties.

And, I'm already working on one of my resolutions! Small sewing projects like these will help me hone my skills so that I can then move on to more advanced items, like dresses. Such as this one. And let's not forget this one. So pretty, and they so need to be in my closet.

A New Year

2010-01-02T21:51:00.003-06:00

It's that time of the year, you know, the beginning. When we're all congratulating ourselves for making it through Christmas without bodily harming any relations, even when they blare Fox News in the background. (Oh, wait. I didn't see my family on Christmas this year...)

Regardless, it's always nice to feel that beginnings and fresh starts are possible. I try to resist the urge to make resolutions, but the fact is that I like making lists, and resolutions are really just the things I think about the rest of the year anyway, so why fight it?

Jewish traditions have a period of reflection and repentance at the end of the old year and a fresh start to the new one. While I don't really go for the whole confession of sins to expunge them from my conscience sort of activity, I do think some reflecting on the year past is in order. You'll see this in another form when I post my Archies.

2009 was an exciting year for me. I graduated with my MA in English after defending my thesis, I job hunted (and interviewed but was not successful, alas), and I moved in Lance to a new place. I now have steady access to a washer and dryer. I saw the Decemberists twice and love them more passionately than ever before. I watched the other building in my apartment complex explode and lived through Ice Storm 2009 and survived to tell the tales. I got a new cat, who is cute and fuzzy. I watched as close friends graduated, bought houses, and moved on to new jobs and places and exciting new prospects. I quit running for six months, only to pick it up again with a renewed love and devotion. While feeling increasingly isolated from my parents, I feel that I'm growing closer to my brothers and my extended family. I cooked and entertained and became a full-fledged vegetarian (well, pescatarian). I took the plunge and applied for Ph.D. programs.

It was a good year.

What does 2010 hold for me? What am I planning, hoping, and wishing for? My goals for the next year are as follows:

To post here more often.
To do less in general (i.e. no running around like crazy all the time)
To foster my creative side more
To continue running regularly, culminating in a half-marathon in the spring and a full marathon in the fall
To start my Ph.D. somewhere awesome!

I think those five will do at present. Lance and I are thinking of the possible move ahead of us (but of course, nothing is certain), so we are working to purge some of our excess belongings waaaay before packing it up is an issue.

I'm exciting about 2010. But then again, when do I not delight in my life? It's a pretty good one if I do say so myself--I have awesome friends, a fantastic partner, fulfilling interests, and a strong sense of where I want to go. Happy New Year, friends!

Starting the Year Off Right

2010-01-01T21:34:00.005-06:00

The new year is a time of celebration with friends and loved ones. It's also a time to think of new beginnings and assess the year gone by and examine hopes for the year ahead. At least that's one way of looking at it.

In this spirit, I found myself awake a bit earlier than my bedtime would indicate, standing in the freezing cold weather, waiting to run 6.2 miles. Why, do you ask, would I put myself through this? On a holiday, nonetheless? Not to mention that I paid for the privilege of (what some may believe, anyway) tormenting myself?

This morning, I ran the Twenty 10k. In October, I had signed up with a training group, subsequently trained for 10 weeks (mostly sticking with the plan!), and registered for the race. It was my first race over a 5k distance, and I felt a good way to launch myself back into the running lifestyle.

After being injured last March training (inconsistently) for a half-marathon, I thought I would tackle something between a 5k distance and 13.1 miles. Hence, the 10k.

It went really well: it was chilly, but I was ready for that since I'd been training in chilly weather a few days a week, and even though I didn't run Wednesday when I was supposed to, I managed to get my last long run in and even ran consistently through the Christmas holidays. And my hard work paid off.

My goal was to finish in under 60 minutes, and I accomplished that. I also placed third in my age group, which makes me feel even better about my running--and makes me want to be faster. I've already signed up for a half-marathon group along with several of the Twenty 10k training group.

So here's to starting the new year off right--and hoping that I am able to keep running and have a great running year.

Chilly Running

2009-12-16T10:01:00.003-06:00

My 2010k training is nearing the end. Just two more weeks until the race--but I'm really excited. I feel pretty good about my running, and I'm looking forward to continuing to run through the winter to get ready for a half-marathon!

The problem with running in the winter is that it's dark and cold. I would probably be in on the treadmill sporadically if I weren't training with a group, so I'm glad I joined up. I own one good cold weather outfit: my running tights and two Patagonia Capilene layers. I don't like to wash them every time I run because it'll decrease the wicking fabric efficacy, so I just wash them once a week or so. After running three or four days outside, they get pretty stinky, so I'm hoping to get a few more tops for Christmas.

Another cold running problem is that my nose runs along with me. You can't exactly stop to blow your nose when you're charging up a hill, so you have to make due the best you can, using a sleeve in a pinch. Ever hear of snot rockets? You have to get that out of your nose somehow, else you can't breathe and can't run! I generally avoid those because I can't bring myself to be that gross, even as I'm coughing and hacking.

Last night we did hill repeats, which were tough, and my chest felt the cold, dry air I tried to suck in all evening. I kept coughing all night until finally I drank some hot tea. Hopefully that won't be a repeat occurrence.

It's going to be tough training through the cold and dark, but if I can stick with it, I'll be in great shape come spring.

It Begins

2009-11-21T07:55:00.004-06:00

The holiday season approaches, which means my mad dash to make lots of handmade things also grows near. Last night, my pal AW hosted a craft night, and I worked on knitting washclothes and making the cutest ornament ever. Here, let me show them to you:
The half-eaten gingerbread man! Deliciously morbid, and morbidly cute!

Now, the not so exciting washcloths (to be paired with nice soaps for a good gift):

Really, though, the whole post was to show you the cuteness of my gingerbread man. I'm going to make like 17 more of them--so very cute!

Cupcake Review

2009-11-20T10:47:00.004-06:00

I dressed up as a Cupcake Queen (or fairy, depending on how you look at my costume) for Halloween this year. The cupcakes in the photo are ones that I made especially for Halloween--Caramel Apple Cupcakes.

Imagine: an apple cupcake, frosted with a caramel cream cheese icing, and topped with a mini caramel apple (with tiny toothpick sticking out of it). They were brilliant and tasted really, really good. Next year I might take a stab at making my own caramel or putting caramel in the middle of the cupcakes.

My point is, of course, that I make really tasty cupcakes (I promise I have testimonies to back me up!). And there aren't really tasty cupcakes to be found commercially in Fayetteville. So when I heard that Bliss Cupcake Cafe was opening in our small town, I got excited. Cupcake shops are something that one usually finds in places like New York City or Washington D.C.

Bliss opened yesterday afternoon; since I was at work, I did not get to experience it directly, so I will only be giving a partial review based on the cupcake that was brought to me. (I plan to go experience for myself and post another review in a week or two.) I got the Pumpkin Maple cupcake: a pumpkin cupcake topped with a maple buttercream and a few toasted pecans. Lance got the Cinnamon Toast, and JH got the Chocolate Marshmallow. They told me that it was a long wait because it was busy, but I'll blame that on opening day problems--I'm sure they'll get it figured out.

Lance tells me that both the Cinnamon Toast and Chocolate Marshmallow were a bit crumbly on the cake--he wanted a moister, denser cupcake. Some folks like the crumby cake, but I prefer a tender, moister crumb myself. The marshmallow topping was really, really good, but the chocolate cake itself was fairly standard. The cupcakes were a bit small but definitely fresh.

My own cupcake--the Pumpkin Maple--was pretty tasty, but while I was eating it, I kept thinking of how my own cupcake would be better. I've made pumpkin cupcakes before, and the ones I've made are full of flavor while still being moist and a little more substantial. The cake was very moist and tender and light as a cloud--but I felt it could have offered more on the flavor end. It disappeared too quickly and didn't encourage careful, contemplative bites. I've made pumpkin cupcakes before, and the ones I've made are full of flavor while still being moist and a little more substantial. I like a cupcake that you can savor, and the cake was too airy and not flavorful enough to do that.

The maple frosting was good in concept--but I'm not a huge fan of buttercream (all sweet, not much flavor); I think a maple cream cheese frosting would have actually been better on this particular cupcake. Since the cake itself was so airy and insubstantial, a heavier and creamier frosting would have balanced it out. The pecans on top was a nice touch, though cinnamon candied pecans would have taken it up to the next notch. My overall impression of this cupcake was that the flavor was too subtle, the sweet was the major note, and it disappeared far too quickly.

Lance, JH, and I think that Bliss definitely has some potential--but they need to work out their kinks. Apparently some of the cupcakes overflowed their cups a bit or were flat--signs that the bakers didn't vary how much they filled the cups based on which recipe there were using. If we're paying roughly $3 for a cupcake, we want something special. And I want something that would inspire me to play around in my own kitchen. I look to the Cupcake Bakeshop blog for inspiration for the kinds of cupcakes I would pay good money for (I'd probably pay $4 or more for one of hers!), and I just don't know if Bliss is at that level. I will, of course, be trying again in a week or so after some of the opening kinks have (hopefully) been worked out.

Any readers try out Bliss Cupcakes? What are your thoughts?

Winning Day

2009-11-19T09:21:00.006-06:00

At the beginning of November, I ran a race--the Veterans Memoria l 5k. It was fairly close to the beginning of my 10k training, but after I had discovered that I could run a bit faster than I thought. I recruited my friend to run the race with me, since he'd never run a 5k before.

This was my first 5k in a long time, so I was pretty excited about it. I decided that since I'd been running so strongly lately, that I would try to run it in about 28 minutes, which I had done before.

Not only did I accomplish my goal--I smashed it to smithereens by finishing in under 27 minutes--I believe a PR (personal record) for me. I knew that the last bit of the race was downhill (the first 2 miles were pretty hilly), so I budgeted my energy and ran the last mile at a good pace. I was so happy and proud with my finishing time, but since I knew that there are lots of women much faster than that--Lance told me about the winner who came in under 20--I didn't dream that I would win anything.

Well, I did. I won my age group (25-29). And not only that, but I came in 11th overall. I'm so happy with the results, and I'm also determined to keep running--and keep running faster. I'm running a 5k on Thanksgiving with my brother, so I'm setting my goal to run between 26-26:30, provided the race course is flat (this one was pretty hilly).

Yay for running!

The Hills!

2009-11-18T14:32:00.004-06:00

Have you ever had the feeling where something just clicks? Where everything lines up, and what you're going after (or have been pursuing), just falls into place?

I feel like that with my running.

I took a six month break from running (March to August) because of a mild injury. The less I ran, the less I felt inclined to run. The less I ran, the more depressed I became. It was obviously a mild depression, but when I put my running shoes back on in August, I became keenly aware of what I'd been missing. And I began to run regularly again, with far more dedication and motivation than before my injury.

At the end of October, I started running with a group: Tuesday nights we run drill, hills, and intervals; Thursday is a "fun run"; Sunday is our long endurance run. I'm going into my fourth week of training, and I'm feeling stronger and faster.

The Tuesday night runs have been both challenging and enjoyable. This Tuesday was a hills run: we sprint up a hill, then run down it and repeat three more times. It's hard. I was able to run at a good pace and not feel completely whipped, so I know that I'm getting better.

Running has been clicking. I've been keeping up with the training plan, and I'm going to sign up for a half-marathon group to run in the spring. I just hope that I find a Ph.D. program that clicks as well as my training has...

So Many Words, So Little Time

2009-11-17T13:24:00.002-06:00

In approximately three weeks, I will be sitting down to take the GRE. Again. When asked why I would torture myself again with this obnoxious test, my reply is that I would like a good stipend/fellowship/shot at admission to an awesome PhD program.

You see, my scores were good but not stellar. I'm close to the minimum score needed to get a better fellowship should I remain at the University of Arkansas (not my top choice, though not a bad one), and I want to do whatever I can to improve my chances at getting into a top program.

So, for the next three weeks, I'm going to be memorizing vocabulary words and taking practice tests in addition to gathering up my application materials, obtaining letters of reference, and editing my writing sample and statement of intent.

Why do I put myself through all this torture? Why am I not just done with school already? Because I belong in a PhD program. The GRE studying has been, well, fun in one sense because I'm studying something. I'm learning and absorbing and filing information away, and I love how that feels. I know in my bones that I'm meant to be in the classroom, both to learn and to teach, and the only way I'm going to get there is to take a jump. And there's certainly no time like the present.

Which Witch is Which?

2009-11-03T21:19:00.004-06:00

Today I was reading papers for the "grammar" side of things, and one of the writers kept using "witch" instead of "which".

The first time it popped up, I underlined it and said "ooh, witch!" and drew a picture of a witch's hat and broom.

The second time, I underlined it and said "a witch! scary". Then in the margin I wrote "witch/which" and using arrows to indicate the word to which I was referring "This one is a noun" and "This one is a subordinating conjunction". I'm sure you can guess where the arrows went.

I circled a few more misuses. The last instance of "witch" in the paper, I drew another witch's hat and broom. I almost drew a black cat, but then I thought maybe it was going over the line.

I wonder if the writer ever confuse the two again...

(PS: Rory returned tonight! Yay for returned kitties).

Have You Seen My Cat?

2009-11-02T18:13:00.003-06:00

LOST:

One adorably fat tabby named Rory, aged 3 years:

She went missing sometime Saturday, October 31st, after 7pm. She had a collar but lost it earlier that afternoon, so she'll have distinct collar marks. If you've seen this kitty, please let me know!

Poor thing--she's very attached to me and rarely strays too far from home. I just hope someone didn't cat-nap her or pick her up to be their new pet...

What Am I Reading?

2009-10-30T16:23:00.004-05:00

Besides my Women's Health, Runner's World, and GRE study book, I am reading a Very Good Book. It's a long book, but the pacing is so well done that I'm not at all sad that I'm only half way through with the story.

What does make me sad is that it's supposed to be the first in a trilogy, and the author is a little...um, particular about the book. The second in the series was supposed to be released in April 2009; however, he has yet to turn in a draft to the publisher, so...

With that warning out of the way for those who dislike waiting for the next book in a series, the book I am discussing is Patrick Rothfuss's The Name of the Wind.

Again, I'm only half-way through the book, so I'm unsure of how it ends, but so far I LOVE THIS BOOK. I WANT TO READ IT ALL THE TIME BUT CAN'T BECAUSE I...*ahem* I don't have time to plow through it in the manner to which I am accustomed, but I'm also content to savor it. It's a finely constructed novel, with layers and good storytelling. I'm obsessed with a good narrative, and I'm even more obsessed with framed narratives, which this is.

What is it about a framed narrative that I just can't put down? It's one reason I love The Arabian Nights' Entertainments and The Princess Bride (just to name a few off the top of my head). I think it's the intricate levels, the feeling of holding two (or more) stories in my hands. The frame gives the story some purpose or point toward which it moves, which means that I don't feel as lost if the threads don't make sense.

Anyway, I feel that I can recommend The Name of the Wind to any fantasy lover, or anyone who loves books that play with the idea of storytelling. Hopefully the rest of the series comes out within the next couple of years AND is as good as this one.